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Monday, 26 December 2011

YOU NO SABI YA MATE, YOU NO DEY FEAR FACE?!!!


I came to Lagos and immediately the air changed. Firstly the okadas, the hustling and shuffling, potential accidents etc. Then someone really made me angry but hey lets laugh a bit at a recycled joke....Are you an Ajebota or an Ajekpakpo

Are you an Ajebota or an AjekpakpoIf as a young lady, before you even dare stepping outside you put on at least a pair of jeans and a T-shirt with a face cap on with matching sneakers, you could pass for an AJEBOTA. But if you repeatedly nonchalantly tie only wrapper round your chest, u throway leg inside foam slippers and waka go Mama Bomboy kiosk to buy maggi seasoning cube, your PAKONESS don attain xtra height.

If your folks, perhaps through an exclusive Country Club, introduced you to a variety of sports like cricket, golf or polo, we would agree that you're an AJEBOTA. But if motor don avoid jamming u repeatedly from either playing "ten-ten", "su-way" or "set (5 per side soccer)", no long thing when I just say u be HEAVY PAKO.

If your clothes were bought exclusively from abroad and you were wearing the latest and most popular name brands that made everybody else wonder, I will classify you as an AJEBOTA. But whereby you specialize for "Boskona" (trying your clothes in a makeshift stall before you purchase) pricing, you are HEAVILY ENPAKOIATED.




If you were the type to get dropped in school and picked up by a driver designated to do so by your parents, I'll qualify you as an AJEBOTA. But if you hold world record of flying "DANFO" and "MOLUE a.k.a. FUNKY TRAIN" in motion or jumping down before them even match brake and you no dey ever wound, I HAIL YOUR PAKO STANDS.

If you were familiar and current with the latest things in vogue, I'll rate you as an AJEBOTA. But if the 1st day you see person wear NIKE chucks and you begin wonder why im put yoruba girl name untop am, PAKOISM don skatta your head.

If you ever toasted a girl/guy speaking perfect Queens English with the latest "fo-ne" slangs and acting "all cool", I think you fall into the AJEBOTA category. But if your type dey approach babe/bobo with tribal mark wey no even sabi ordinary "is & was", you con mix am with your very strong and conk native dialect and you still dey try to show yourself with "ibon (bad English)" for the small grammar wey you think say you know, you are genetically PAKOlised.

If you either have a dry cleaner that picks up your family clothing and returns them washed, ironed and folded, or maybe you personally take them there to get the same job done, or you have a washing machine in the house and maid who finalizes the rest part, we'll fit you into the AJEBOTA clan. But then, if you dey use one full iron bucket of OMO to soak your "cloth (plural for cloth in pidgin)", den u spread untop concrete-slab for "super scrub" with Kongi soap to hustle that troublesome collar, dip in back & forth until e turn to milk colour, hand-squeeze am with your upper bodi facing 1 direction while d cloth face d opposite direction, snap and flap d cloth in mid-air like 15 times to discharge (remove) d wrinkles before u use "wooden peg" to hold am for back-yard rope or better yet, lay am over your corrugated iron fence, NNA MENNNNNNNNN, your PAKO level don nearly cross perfect 10!!!!!!!!


If you happen to do emergency laundry for an outfit you need to wear in a very short while, you pop it into a dryer and hit buttons to get it ready, some how, some way, you're an AJEBOTA. But if after washing, u squeeze it out, carry towel, roll am inside d towel and another person dey d other end make una for pull with force to drain d water come outside (what we refer to as "TOWEL DRYING" in KC), and den finally u use your coal iron steam-dry am, u be PAKO oooooo!!!!

If every summer after school your idea of a holiday is looking forward to yet another trip to Jand or Yankee, you are an in-born AJEBOTA. But if u begin jump up because say una dey go village for New Yam Festival and hunting seasons dey coincide, hence u fit finally throway your "Egungun" outfit and flex d new 1, no vex when I say u be PAKO.


If you by any choice you were just as angry as I was when I wrote this, I hope you feel better

Mena

Saturday, 24 December 2011

MERRY CHRISTMAS FROM ME AND SOME OTHER PEOPLE....AND GREAT GIFTS FROM LADY GAGA ...LETS GIVE TO THOSE WHO REALLY NEED HELP..BISOUS



Hi
We thank God for seeing this period, May the soul of our dearly departed who cou;dnt make it RIP xxx

Finally got my leave, my family came in from various parts of the world so its been fun so far. I am sure you are having as much fun as I am.

I also like to think of this period as a time to give. Permit me to share stories in between the pictures
i.e
Lady Gaga announces gifts to her fans: Lady Gaga fans have to make sure they take some time off from their merry making on Christmas Day to check out the special gift their idol will deliver that day. Its going to be special because the gift is an unreleased song from her Born This Way album! Shaking my head and rolling my eyes but i guess its the *thought* that counts




There is more giving: Hollywood star Angelina Jolie travelled to meet some of the thousands of Syrian refugees on the country's border with Turkey.

The actress and goodwill ambassador for the United Nations High Commissioner for Refugees (UNHCR), shared fruit and dessert with Syrians who have fled the government's bloody crackdown.

Flying in on a private jet, she took boxes of toys for children at a camp in Turkey to which which nearly 10,000 have fled.

Jolie spent two-and-a-half hours at camp in Altinozu, 12 miles (20km) away from the Syrian border.

She reportedly asked them how they were in Arabic, before speaking with them through an interpreter.


I appreciate the opportunity to visit this camp and talk to these families.

Angelina Jolie
Reports also said she took notes and showed particular interest in the women and children.

"The people in this camp have fled in fear for their lives, and many told me they were distraught about the safety of loved ones still in Syria," Jolie said in a UNHCR statement.

She met with one woman who left Syria heavily pregnant, and has since given birth to her child in the camp.

The woman told how her husband had been killed. Another woman told Jolie how she was sick with worry about her husband who was still in Syria and unable to cross the border."I appreciate the opportunity to visit this camp and talk to these families," Jolie said.

Protests first erupted in Syria in mid-March during the 'Arab Spring' uprising.

More like it, she wasnt exploiting her fame or status for a new movie, it was genuine..

Anyway here is more Merry Christmas stories and photos from the classy to the tacky

Spooky:
Dear Friend of The Vine,

At this time of the year it's especially important to think of others. Being a middle-aged punster, I often joke that how you think of your family is all "relative". Something that is relative is how we view poverty. Many of us have been hit by hard times in this economic squeeze and Christmas for many is not the same as previous years.

In Zimbabwe there are doctors performing caesarian sections with the lights from their cell phones. In Kenya there are 4,000 Somalis (mostly women and children) arriving at the Kakuma refugee camp every week. Here in Denver, homeless families living in hotels have been forced to move out due to cockroach infestations.




We may not have cozy answers as to why tragedy and hardship befalls us but we can be assured that God has not abandoned us. In October I visited Albania and was asked to speak to a group of 150 refugees living in a large building with one outhouse. The families inside earned less than $5.00 a day. I shared on the Christmas story. It was very special to see the combination of joy, serious thought and conviction at the end of the time of sharing. People could begin to see that despite unemployment, uncertainty and poor health, we have a creator and a savior that listens, cares and wants to be with us. Even more than that, we have a creator and savior who has been there!

Classy:
* Jesus was born into poverty... into a hard working family doing their best to make ends meet. He was born in a barn.

* Jesus was born into a situation where people would be suspicious about the circumstances of his birth. Back in the 1970's when I was in school, kids born out of wedlock were given a pretty rough time.

* Jesus was presented to God in the Temple with the offering of the poor. Mary and Joseph presented 2 young pigeons.

* Jesus as a toddler was taken across an international boundary because of a valid threat of persecution. He became a refugee. Many have asked over the years, what happened to the gifts of gold, frankincense and Myrrh, surely they couldn't have been that poor? Having lived as a missionary most of my life, my guess would be that it got them to Egypt and then they found themselves using it to help others in need. Did Joseph find a job? How did they communicate? What kind of help did they get finding somewhere to live? How did they deal with the fear of a different culture?

* Jesus had to face the common question of "why me?" when he returned to see the parents of children that had been slaughtered in a genocide by Herod. I've been surrounded by many people that have suffered greatly in their emotions because they were a survivor. What was it like for Jesus to come home?

As we enter this Christmas season let us not just stand in awe that God came to Earth as man but also stand in awe that God Himself has been there when we think of the homeless families in the hotel, when we think of refugees, when we think of the poverty that is the result of evil regimes in places like Burma and Zimbabwe.


Ahem:

It's my prayer that as we ponder how amazing Jesus is and as we approach 2012 that you will enter this New Year:

* Listening... to people in their pain and be the emotional, spiritual and social support to people in need that Jesus calls us to be.

* Praying... for the end of regimes that are causing suffering to millions.

* Giving... to organizations that are making a real difference in the lives of the hurting.

At CoAid there is a lot we can do in the coming year to ease the plight of children in Burma and help refugees know that Jesus understands because he has been there.

May you be blessed and be a blessing in this Christmas season.

Please consider making a donation to the work of CoAid:
www.thevine.co.nz/coaid (or any other charity of your choice)

Thank you and God bless,

MERRY CHRISTMAS ONCE AGAIN


Mena

Wednesday, 21 December 2011

SEE ME SEE TROBU MY PIPU.....(PT 4)




MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYBODY!!
SO its 2 days to my casual leave yippee skippee! What a last quarter of year with all the illnesses, the fickleness of friendships, et all..Upon all I am still happilly me too!!!

Anyway, here is a Story I found..Long read and kinda materialistic but worth it: Do these kind of men exist especially in Nigeria (no offence meant o, *just saying*
A guy who has no job got married to a banker, despite his fears and advices that it is not good to marry without a job.
... Every month the girl will give the guy her full salary N135,000 after removing her N15,000 tithe. The guy will give the wife N20,000 for personal up keep and guy determines what happens to the remaining money, this thing happened for 3good years. There was happiness in the family & the girl never refuse to do her primary home duty for that 3 years despite wrong advice from friends. That you can't pay the bills & still be doing all the work.
There was a particular month the guy used about N70,000 to travel from state to state for different interviews.
The guy finally got a job with a good firm in port Harcourt and his salary was N600,0...00 monthly for a start.
He bought his first car (a brand new) for N4.5m, he gave the wife the car keys. So he took public transport to work for about 2years b4 he bought the second car for N6 million. After he bought the second car he took the keys of the 1st car & gave the wife the key of the second car but the wife refused. so the guy started taking public transport to work for one month. The wife now decided to take d new car for the guy to stop taking public transport to work. They very very were happy.
They finally moved into their personal house after some few years.
One day, the wife was looking for some documents, she now saw a file codedly hidden, when she opened the file, she saw her wedding picture when she was very slim in the first page of the file. She finally saw that the document to the purchase of the land & every other things in the house contains her name only. At the last page was the guy's wedding picture and a note written by the husband, '' MY WIFE IS ALL I HAVE GOT, NOT EVEN THIS HOUSE WHICH IS WORTH N24MILLION".
This couple got married in 1998. Last Sunday was their wedding anniversary with two children a boy & a girl.
Now thats true Love huh?



MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYBODY AND ESPECIALLY MY FAMILY OF BLOGGERS, YOU DONT KNOW HOW MUCH YOUR W RITE UP ENCOURAGES ME OR WHEN YOU VISIT AND READ COMMENTS HOW IT PUSHES ME ON....Have a wonderful day

Friday, 16 December 2011

SEE ME SEE TROUBLE MY PIPU....(PT 3)



Hello!!! Matters Arising: Ah well I have decided to buy a huge christmas tree and put it in my Abuja flat because I can predict that I as the first girl that refused to marry!!! will be houdered this christmas so am spending christmas and new year here in FCT and working in between!

Pardon the digression, my peeps, this blog is really a comment from a poster in part 2 and decided to publish it as it helped me..And also because I believe it will help those under pressure to marry and those who are desperate to marry..All comments are wecome as usual
l. xxxx

Blessed one said...
Mena,

Thank you for this recent post. I have been checking your blog periodically to see if you have posted part 2 of "see me see trouble my pipu" and I am glad you have. First of, I was laughing my head off while reading your post. It was just hilarious.

All I can say is this, do not let anyone, not even your mother pressure you or rush you into marraige. It is better to be single and have peace of mind than be married and have no peace of mind. I am going to share a true life story with you that happened in my family. As a matter of fact, it happened to my older sister (our firstborn). You see, my immediate older sister (second born) was the first to get married. After she got married and started having her kids, my mother started putting immense pressure on the first born to get married, telling her that what will people say/think that her juniour sister is married and she is not, blah, blah, blah.

Well, my older sister succumbed to the pressure and got married to a guy from abia state who told her at their first meeting that he was a "business man" which is a term perpetually unemployed naija men use to deceive gullible ladies. My sister apparently did not dig deeper to find out more about this guy due to family/societal pressure I guess and chose to marry him.

They have been married for almost 10 years and my sister is and has been the sole bread winner of the family in all these years. Her husband has no job and is neither searching for one or looking for what to do with his pathetic life. He is verbally abusive towards my sister as well. My sister went from a size 10 to a size 22W and she is 5'7 in height. She is obese because she is depressed and sinks herself into food. The husband on the other hand is busy forcing himself on the housemaids. The older housemaid refuses his advances. The other housemaid is 12years old and he was constantly sticking his fingers into her private part.

As God could have it, my mom's friend sent her underage daughter to my sister's house to pick up some items and my sister's husband tried to sleep with her. The girl went back and reported to her mother and her mother confronted my mom about it. My mom confronted my sister who vehemently denied her husband's actions. Well my mom went to my sister's house and took the underage housemaid from my sister. After the child was brought to our home, the girl now confessed all the things my sister's husband was doing to her. My sister was speechless but now claims he has changed.

Meanwhile, my sister's 7 year old daughter has been complaining of virginal pain. My mom now thinks that her father (my sister's husband) is sexually molesting his own daughter. The thing is, my mother now sees that my sister maried the wrong man and wants my sister to leave him but my sister insists on staying with a husband who has called her fat, ugly, smelly amongst other things all because she does not want to raise her kids in a broken home. Her husband has even told her that if he had the opportunity, he will leave her for a young girl from igboland. This is a man who does not pay rent, children's school fees, nothing!

My sister used to have so much money as a single career woman and lead a comfortable, peaceful life but now, she is constantly broke. In the eyes of the law she is married but in practicality, it seems like she is not because her husband does not help her with anything. He is like a trophy just occupying space on a shelf and a paedophile and pervert as well. My sister now looks like a shadow of herself, is constantly in and out of the hospital and has a very low self esteem.

Today, she blames our mother for her woes because it was our mother who was putting pressure on her to get married thereby indirectly pushing her into the arms of a gold digging abusive paedophile of a man who does not give a damn about her.

I am sorry for my long post but I thought I share this with you because as human beings, we only have one life to live. I believe that marraige should be enjoyed and not endured. Most Nigerian marraiges are hell on earth where domestic violence, gross infidelity, lies, unequal division of labour, disrespect and much more rule supreme. The average naija man does not know how to love his wife like Christ loved the church. He saw what his father did to his mother and he does the same to his wife. In other words, the circle of marital abuse continues.

Mena, in our generation, there are alot of Nigerian men who are just taking advantage of the fact that society puts enormous pressure on women to get married. Naija men are aware that whether they are irresponsible or not, naija women are willing to mary them to avoid societal stigma. Unfortunately, the family unit suffers down the line, the children suffer, and the woman who chose such a man suffers most. Don't believe the lies that "men are scarece". Men are in abundance but good responsible men who are God fearing and have high moral values is what is lacking and much has to do with the decay in morals and values in the country we know as Nigeria.

Don't let anyone pressure you into marraige until you are convinced that the man you are willing to settle down with is the one. There are alot of emotionally and mentally UNSTABLE men and women in Nigeria. You must be very careful. Nigerian society is also crawling with perverts, paedophiles and sexually depraved men who get away with their heinous act. Many who see nothing wrong with having sex with their daughters or raping females. Ask yourself, is that the kind of man you will love to build a home with? If you happen to birth any daughters, they will never forgive you in the future if their father sexually molested them.

I live outside Nigeria but when I am ready to move back to the African continent, I will settle with my family in another African country and not Nigeria. With all that is going on in Nigeria, it will only be a matter of time before crap hits the fan. In all you do, be prayerful Mena and let God lead your way. God Bless!

9 December 2011 10:33

Tuesday, 13 December 2011

Exclusive photos from Chinedu (Aki) and Nneoma's church wedding..#I m a sucker for romance

Hello

Will continue with see me see trouble pt3 but this pictures came exclusively to me to piublish. I dont normally publish on the celeb world but I feel this is a special case..plus I can hear my mum and dad saying ogbotornomemena(my first girl child) when will you do yours and stop commenting/writing on other peoplees ...hiss...
therefore my christmas in Lagos will be 23-27. New Year in Abuja ALONE...Absolutely no family stress before I purchase an AK47 on this marrer

I digress, Enjoy the photos goes the pictures

























This is the groom and his parents :




This is the bride and her parents:



Mena wishes them the best like can offer

Any thoughts? warm wishes? comments?

Wednesday, 7 December 2011

SEE ME SEE TROUBLE MY PIPU....(PT 2)



This is a continuation of SEE ME SEE TROUBLE MY PIPU

Let me start by saying people have always said that I am quirky, quite intelligent and somewhat old fashioned and always seek enlightenment in every field possible so why am I not married yet? all I can reply is that I want a stable marriage. I wanted to live with an intelligent, educated( both formal or informal)man that I have things in common with, someone I can discuss with intellectually with, someone who is patient and gentle, very capable of laughing in difficult situations. He maybe a party person, who moderately loves the delights of Holland (Wink), a sports/sports channel fan but understand I prefer romantic quiet moments, prefer discussing issues like; politics, family life, relationships and so on. In addition I would love to spend time and my earnings on the less privileged, love walks in the park, attending plays at the theatre, climbing mountains and just enjoying being together thats the kind of man that I could spend the rest of my life with.


Yeah thats me up there trying on a wedding dress as my closest friend, Jing Zhao was interested wedding dresses that day at one of the shops at Selfridges, London

My parents have put so much pressure on me that I have been forced to consider the wrong people and call it God's special Grace, raw instinct or self preservation but even with the gernomous pressure I flee from those wrong people.

Ever since I relocated I have met mostly dishonest, abusive, unreliable or gold digger types (though I blame the latter economy) Yes I have met decent people too but they are almost all happily married.


Soh He was one of the few people I met on my first week here. He asked for my number and call it loneliness I gave it to him. From there we chatted a lot. He told me he was renting his place and his earnings were xxxxxx. (I didnt ask him o!!) Then we started going on dates where he will insist on surprising me with the "tastes of Abuja" which consisted of sharing a single shawarma on two occassions. Then he just like that wanted to make out and even have sex. I told him in clear terms, that he hasnt even asked me out, I have certain priniciples on making out & sexual intercourse (no i no holy pass but you get the drill). He went quiet and then said he understood. Needless to say I saw less and less of him, he stopped calling, when I called he was busy. When we mistakenly met he told me "his relative" was ill. At the same time I fell very ill and thought it was a small thing until I was rushed to the hospital. On resumption I went to the company clinic (where I met Doh a consultant doctor taking a maternity cover for our regular doctor. more later) Well with Soh I figured it was the whole I refuse-to-make out-and-have-sex-barely-a-week-after-knowing-you-exist thing and let him go, no be this age I go dey accept plate of rubbish jare..

Only for him to call me from the blues tell me that "the relative" lost his life upon all their efforts. So I decided to visit him at his home. I felt odd that he introduced me to his mum with my current post like one gbo gbo bigz powerful girlz, I felt odd...Anyway he sat me down and then he explained that the person that died was not a relative but his dad. He said he was ashamed at the time to let me know that at his age midthirties he was still living with parents, earning xxxxx.(All that wouldnt have mattered to me if he had said it from the start ooo but the lies killed it for me) I hadnt finished digesting the lies when he began on me, he rained verbally abusive words on me not being there for him. Being so damned hot and sexy on the outside (his words, i dont buy flattery that easily), yet having so called principles on the inside etc etc I managed (in btw the rants) to tell him I was ill myself at that point. Then he did a 360 and said now his dad was gone he was going to 'chase' me on my terms. I was just gobsmacked and decided to just reduce this friendship to acquaintanceship... not knowing one more shocker awaited me; one day there was suddenly no water in my area so i called him and asked if there was water in his, he said yes and said he will send two 20litres of water in jerrycans to me. I was grateful. Only for the next day I asked him if he could take me somewhere for lunch since he had a car and I was on medication at the time. He gruffly replied that I should go without him, he is in a meeting. I asked someone else (fah more on him later...i say troubu dey lol) and he agreed and we went for lunch as a group. Soh happened to see us and sent me a bbm asking me to return both of his 20litres jerry can that moment. Laugh bin wan tear my belle so if na better thing he did for me he would have asked for it back on the back of seeing me eating lunch with a group of other people.I asked for a reminder of his address so i can send them to him, he says no he will come and get them himself. I keep his kegs outside my gate. But he comes saying he felt like a mugu, felt hurt and jealous at the fact that i went with someone else. He used words I dont want to repeat but wont forget. After all said and done, he says he will continue "chasing me" I said we are just acquaintances now as I have never met any man as petty as he was. He still insisted on chasing....

Well now its time for Doh: His own was like a badly done Nigerian home video. As I mentioned before, I met doh while I was ill, my blood sugar level was too low so I had to keep coming to him every morning for an accucheck. So we got talking and one day he states that I am the woman he wants. I was shocked as that was unprofessional but I guess this is naija. Since I had to keep seeing him for my blood sugar checks anyway,I ignored it. But then he told me about himself asked a bit about myself (in the guise of checking my habits and why my blood sugar was so low) And finally asked me out on a date speaking a lot about my body and that its unbelievevable I was single with that body and look.(Again his words) Well my mum had spent that week guiltripping me on this marrigae and children issue even with my illness that I was almost climbing the walls in offence. We went on the date, I didnt like where he took me (nkwobi joint) as after such a bout of illness, hygiene was very high on my list. Then he drops me off, wanted to come in but I said no. He kept exclaiming that my area was lovely, that they must pay me a huge amount of money. Now all this I am saying is literally day to day like Monday then teusday then the next etc etc. So on thursday my blood sugar was stable and I went to the office for a full day and saw all the work I had to do was piled up waiting for me, so naturally I was busy but Doh kept calling just to say sexy words and just generally distracting me, so after explaining for the fifth time that I had a lot to do and that my position in the office was too strategic for me to use my phone at will, I just had to ignore him. That day I closed very very late and was walking home with a laptop and lots of documents, very heavy laden in a dark corner when Tee called to say hi. I explained I was walking in ssss street when he asks me to go straight back into the office as its not safe to walk on that lonely road alonr and then he drove down just to pick me and dropped me off at home, with my bbm and phone going off due to Doh's odd possessiveness. The next day friday I spoke to him (Doh) that I would be in a meeting till late. The meeting started and he started bbm and texting and calling. (Twas in that meeting that I met gigolo Rah) The meeting went on till very late so I honestly couldnt take calls nor reply text messages. When the meeting was over it was sooooo late, Rah offered to take me home and dropped me at my gate, On getting to my bed I read Doh's messages or at least his final one. I thought you were different from other Abuja girls,you refused to pick calls because you were with men. If you ever hear from me again.etc etc I gave him a befitting reply and stopped all communications..He still kept calling and calling for almost a month and only recently stopped....

Ra:,Remember he took me home? he kept telling me to attend his church and preaching at me. I figured since he was the church type I have at last found an Abuja friend...This was until he started saying he had a fiancee and several other lady friends on his case but he really likes me, that I am so calm, so sexy, so hot I do things to him etc.(Again his words) That he is ready to leave his long term girlfriend for me..Now apart from him being almost as young as my baby brother. His tales were quite bizarre. He said his long term girlfriend is a virgin but was once pregnant but even after an abortion, she is still technically a virgin. Or the one about prefferring older women friends and how he used to give them great sex in exchange of material benefits. How one day, on the promise of getting a generator, he "did" one Bank Bigz Girlz till she had multiple orgasms but she never got him the Gen etc etc. I couldnt reconcile these stories so I finally told him to keep the faith in his church, and be faithful to his 'virgin' and maybe marry her soon before he gets tempted to disvirgin her again. Then kept our friendship level on colleague at work level because I NOTU FITTU SHOUTU NOR ADVICEU ANYBORRY. Everyone is entitled to their *ahem* stupidity!! and beliefs.

As for Fah: he was just a short pervert from the first day we started talking, we hardly spoke at eye contact bcos he had 'wandering' eyeballs all over whatever I was wearing. Several times he was meant to give me sensitive document, but will first make to kiss me (NAIJA AGAIN and untop the fact that he had to almost climb a chair to get to my lips) at which I warned him seriously. Someone tried to reconcile us and that was when we all went for the lunch that got (SOH) hopping mad. The straw that broke the camel's back was when I saw him with another guy at his office and he came later on and with pride swelling in his entire 5ft 4 inch frame, told me that the guy in his office asked out of some particular ladies at work,which one was he 'doing'. I promptly decided it wasnt necessary to have a friend in Abuja. I will look for movies or go to Lagos or/ and London frequently

Tee is nice, he came to pick me up that night I closed real late, even telling me to go back to a safe place (my office) and wait for him. Tee is a gentleman, the first and only time we went clubbing he was a gentleman and very well behaved making sure I got my home safely and going back to his own home. Tee is evasive about the real things but can talk a lot about vague odd, 'herbs' induced topics. Tee is very very laid back. Tee avoids discussing serious issues. Tee obviously finds me very sexually attractive and says he likes the mysterious way my mind works as well, Tee talked a lot about this multimillion naira business he runs yet he has no money to call me for more than a minute, I REFUSE to do the call back. Tee is engaged, Tee loves topics about inspiration and business too. Tee recently opened up to me about some financial issues stuff and I said I would try and help...but...but....but...then I began to wonder why cant his family help, or his fiancee or her family help? and It hit me like a punch out of the blue, I was probably being taken for a mug yet again. I had to tear out my hair, shred my garments and holler (all in my mind) JUST BECAUSE SOMEONE STUDIED A COURSE ABROAD AND MOVED BACK HOME TO WORK DOESNT MAKE HER A MONEY TREE...So I stalled and stalled and stalled and thats where we are right now.

Now I am thinking of ways to avoid my mother's calls because they are ALL about whose marriage she attended followed by this annoying 'how far' which is just code for have you found a man to settle down and have children with within 3 months of relocation even including illness. Yes I want a family but please dont push me into eternal pain, I could be quite melancholic and sensitive so wont use my own feet to walk into eternal pain.

And on a similar note: A popular society lady once said I think everyman is looking for a replacement for his mother. That’s one thing I have learnt. In life, every man looks for that woman who would not just be his wife but his mother, whose paramount objective is to ensure that he can be the best man he is meant to be. Perhaps in me he has been able to find that combination of wife and mother. The mother element is very important, because it’s only your mother that you would trust so absolutely to be able to deliver the best judgments and to be able to pull you back when they think you are doing something wrong. It’s just to have absolute trust in your judgment and go to bed with both eyes closed.

Could she be right?





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Monday, 21 November 2011

SEE ME SEE TROUBLE MY PIPU....(PT 1)


Hello and Welcome to my first blog of the week. I am lucky to be alive to see the sky is so blue,even the heat of the North Central Nigeria is fine with me.

I hardly write about my personal life nowadays but so many things have happened and I dont know where to start. I just came out of the doors of death. This thing happened on the 7th and its just today 21 Nov that I am getting myself together. I thought it was dysmennorhea but it was much worse. I thank God I am alive

First my relocation was not very smooth, I moved from UK to Lagos and from there to FCT for work.

Work has not been smooth sailing I was thrown in shit creek without a paddle. There was no orientation period to introduce the new girl to who did what so I had to find things out myself. Well I found out there was a Queen BitchI.
Her reputation is all over the company. She is very very very rude. My CEO asked me to get a document for her for an international organisation and she shouted at me that she is not getting it.....The rumour mill is agog about her hold on my CEO bcos he did nothing. The same tatafo united says she had a tongue lashing from the CEO's wife due to the unusual hold she has on him. But thats by the way side, In another occassion, my contract reads I come at 9 and leave at 5 except where on expedient cases. So Iobeyed my contract till she queried me on why my timing I replied that its in my contract and walked out of the office. She used office politics to organise a HR meeting for us to know our roles and a million roles was added to mine. I just smiled as I love challenges and brought up when she screamed at me, she said she wasnt there to make friends, I told her that from where I come from I am used to people working as a team, and 'enemies' cant work as teams. The HR met with us seperately......

Then this relocation thing hasnt gone down well with me I have been ill from time to time. For the first bout of illnesses the Queen Bitch1 at first was nice but for the second bout of illnesses which happened this month 7th November where I believed I was at the door of death that she showed her through colours. I live alone and hardly have friends here and so when the illness hit i was alone, I was rolling on my bed, in tears. I couldnt tell my parents as I just left them (there was a public holiday) I told her and a male colleague at the office. The male colleague was worried. She ignored me and told the male colleague that what she says will not go down well with me....I went through all sorts of treatments at the hospital and finally had to go through an endoscopy to find out. I lost 2 kg painfully. Can you imagine I was just coming out of anaesthic when she called to rudely ask for some files. As life will have it soon after her call she started throwing up and stooling uncontrollably and had to go to the hospital. After then she called and called to pray for me.........see me see life..

Then at my home address in FCT there lives a lebanese Queen BitchII
who possibly suffers some sort of superiority complex by virtue her race or something because her very very rude and demeaning 'commandments' are just out of this world you would think she owned the place.
Well her 'dance with me' was when she complained to someone to complain to someone to tell someone to tell me that I leave my gen on all night that it affects her. (Did that like twice) I told the chain of people that Queen B's Gen is directly under my window and blows fumes into my bathroom and toilet. So she should come and relocate that generator sharply. She said through her chains of people that her gen was there all the while and besides its a silent gen. Er well I quickly told the chains of people that first of all it makes just as much as mine, second of all, AS FATE WILL HAVE IT, I live there now so she should remove it. She didnt, and luckily the electric power situation is much better here in FCT but when its not, I use my gen as and when I deem fit and she still blasts her gen fumes into my bath as well. So we were at a crossroad till the landlord came and decided to build a general generator house.. Queen Bitch II complained that the generator house was too near her window and the fumes nd the noise will disturb her. Mind you its not near her window at all, especially not in the way hers was directly under my window. Well landlord's word stays she is free to leave when her contract expires.

I still say see me see life abi how una see am?

Then my mum and settle down with man issues will be written down later in part 2


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Friday, 18 November 2011

GAGA ABOUT POPPING PILLS AT STRANGE PARTIES? READ THIS....



A new drug in market that makes sex so much easier without the worries of the past: One Saturday night a young girl was taken by 5 men, who according to hospital and police reports, gang raped her before dumping her.Unable to remember the events of the evening, tests later confirmed the repeat rapes along with traces of Rohypnol in her blood, with Progesterex, which is essentially a small sterilization pill. The drug now being used by rapists at parties to rape and sterilize their victims.Progesterex is available to vets to sterilize large animals. Rumour has it that Progesterex is being used together with Rohypnol, the date rape drug.As with Rohypnol, all they have to do is drop it into the girls drink. The girl can't remember a thing the next morning, of all that had taken place the night before.Progesterex, which dissolves in drinks just as easily, is such that the victim doesn't conceive from the rape and the rapist needn'tworry about having a paternity test identifying him months later.The drug’s effects are not temporary- They are permanent!!!Progesterex was designed to sterilize horses... Any female who takes it will never be able to conceive. They can get this drug from anyone who is in vet school or any university. It's that easy, and Progesterex is about to breakout big everywhere. Believe it or not, there are even sites on the Internet telling people how to use it.Please COPY this to everyone you know, especially girls.


So please be careful when you're out, and don't leave your drink unattended. Please make the effort to pass this onto all you know...Guys, please inform all your female friends and relatives. Girls, keep your drinks safe at all times, and men, look after the girls you're with. Parents do look after your daughter,watch what she takes..nobody can be trusted,see all the evil this drug can do!!

Mena

Tuesday, 1 November 2011

MESSAGE TO AFRICAN AMERICAN WOMEN "YOU DESERVE TO BE SINGLE!' Another advicer in chief to single women (specifically AA now ) oh and happy november xx



I saw this article back in March and almost got beheaded for my strong views on it, but hey, lets hear from you...Long read and full of ebonics (source at the end)

I saw a grown ass woman on TV praying for a man. This chick had her hands clasped together praying for a good man on some “Are You There God, it’s me Thirsty“ type shit. Everyone wants someone. But a relationship should not define your life. I have no problem with women wanting to be in love, but I have big issues with women who are obsessed with being in a relationship just for the sake of saying they’re in one. Drawing hearts, regurgitating love quotes, watching that stupid ass Notebook movie, have a Sunny D if you’re that damn thirsty. “I wish he were here” Who is he!?! Stop living in a fantasy world, no man will ever be the ideal boyfriend you picture when you’re single! You want love, that’s normal. But when you’re in love with the thought of being in love—that’s destructive.

YOU ARE ULTRA RATCHET: I have love for my ratchets, they’re down to party in the club with the tags still on their dress and regardless of how little hair they have on their head they can pull that shit into a ponytail. But their are women out there that hit level 36 on the Ratchetmon meter and evolve into the mythical Ultra Ratchet, they have no class, no manners, and they generally don’t want shit out of life. Why would any man want to be in a relationship with a woman who’s always angry, doesn’t work, doesn’t go to school, and her purpose in life is to act out like she’s 15 years old? You know the type that smokes weed around her kids, gets an attitude if you holla at her homegirl and not her, and then starts rumors about everyone who’s happily in love. I don’t care if you have Daddy issues, fuck this “product of my environment” excuse, own up to your insecurities and stop basking in your basicness. How do you expect someone to love you if you clearly don’t love yourself?


SUCKER FOR LOVE: Raise your hand if you’ve given men money, the use of your car, or sex just because he asked. Every minute a sucker is born, and it’s not just men tricking, a woman will come out of pocket fast as hell these days, and won’t even realize she’s being used. Why? Because he dropped those three small words on her. It has nothing to do with her IQ, its game. Some women fall in love with a pretty smile and long dreads and the next thing you know their credit score drops lower than Dionne Warwick’s breasts . If he’s out with his friends in your car and you’re at home updating your Facebook Status, guess who’s in love with whom?


MS. PACMAN: Girls love to be chased, and men love to chase. But what happens when you’re caught? It’s not happily ever after, in two months you’ll be flirting with the new nigga on your job. Your Coochie doesn’t tingle the same way it use to now that you’re fucking the same dude every Saturday night. Your entire swag was built around being a cock tease—now you have dick coming out of your ears. You need the flirting, the slick talk, the “should I or shouldn’t I” feeling that comes when he’s in pursuit of your pussy. I knew this girl who had a boyfriend, would always let me feel her up, but wouldn’t take it further than that because she was “faithful”. You’re letting me rub on your ass and kiss your neck while saying “stop boy, I got a man”. You think he’s cool with that!? Why the fuck do you have a dude if he can’t get you as moist as the wolfish nigga who just wants to use you as a semen deposit box?

YOU LOVE TO SHAKE YOUR ASS:
If you’re in a relationship and you would rather go to the club than sit home and watch a movie with your man— You’re not ready. Boring is not a fact, it’s an opinion. “Oh he’s so boring; he doesn’t want to do anything”. Guess what? If you’re in a real relationship, you don’t have to do shit– literally. The best thing about being handcuffed is that I don’t have to entertain anyone. It’s been times I’ve sat on the couch lost in my own thoughts, she’s sitting there doing her nails, I look up, and she’s smiling. Happy as fuck. That’s love. There is nothing wrong with going out and dancing, but if you’re in the club the same amount of times you were before you had a boyfriend, then what’s the point? If getting pinned against the wall and letting a nigga grind on your ass to the latest Chris Brown track excites you more than a quiet lunch with your dude, you deserve to be single.


YOU’RE LIVING IN THE PAST: Remember such and such who moved away to go to school, you could have married him. Remember such and such you went to prom with, you could have had his baby. Remember such and such who had a girlfriend, he was perfect. GET OVER IT! Michael Jackson is dead, yeah I miss MJ, but you don’t see me playing Billie Jean every god damn day, I got other shit to listen to. Women blow me with this inability to get over past relationships and what could have been. You carry this bullshit into a new relationship and compare everyone to Victor, the nigga who “understood you” but died. That nigga didn’t understand you. It’s your memory of that man that makes him look 7 feet tall when he was really 5”4. How can you honestly say you’re ready to be involved with someone new when you’re constantly looking over your shoulder?


POPULARITY MAKES YOU CUM: Every woman reading this has at least twenty dudes in her phone who want to fuck her, it’s what makes her break her neck every time she gets a text message. She doesn’t give a fuck if Tasha is off work; she’s worried about if one of her “friends” is hitting her up. If I were a female I would have a 100 niggas in my phone and be constantly entertained by the attention they shower on me. But if you have a boyfriend guess what, he’s not having that shit. You better not even say happy birthday to a nigga in your phonebook if you belong to me. Women don’t always understand that, “we’re just friends, what’s the big deal”. Don’t be na├»ve, you don’t crack a smile when a homegirl texts you, but when a homeboy texts you you’re Heath Ledger. It may be innocent to you, but their is a limit to how much of you gets shared with other men. There is a difference between flirting and fixating, and if you can’t wait to get off the phone with your so called boo so you can see what some other nigga just wrote you, you deserve to be single.

THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN MAKING LOVE AND FUCKING: What do you like about your boyfriend? What makes you love him? Go ahead and answer in your head… you’re lying. You don’t give a fuck about the conversations you have because his dumb ass can’t speak without using double negatives. You like the dick. Just say it.You are in a relationship because you want to fuck and fuck often. You’re not going out to art exhibits, you’re not taking in an NBA game, you are at home getting long dicked while a Golden Girl rerun plays in the background. Sex is fun, we all like it, but a relationship isn’t built on sex alone. You’re telling yourself you love this guy, but you don’t know anything about him except that his mother’s name is Janet and he likes to run his tongue from your clit down to your ass when he goes to eat it. I’m sorry if this is the first guy who ever made you cum, but that doesn’t make him the Romeo to your Juliet. A relationship built on nut busting is thinner than Naomi Campbell’s edges. You’re not in a relationship, you’re in a gonzo. Try holding the coochie back a week and see how many times you argue, suddenly you realize that this dude isn’t compatible. If all you want is sex why complicate it? That’s right, you don’t want your friends to judge you so you have to hide your freakiness under some flimsy relationship.


YOU DON’T KNOW WHAT YOU WANT: Why do you want a boyfriend? Because your ex moved on? Because your bestie wants to double date? Because it’s raining and your feet are cold and you could use a man to snuggle? You’re being an ass. Do you know what you have? Freedom! You can go anywhere you want to. You can talk to anyone you want to? You can flirt, you can fuck, you make him eat you out in the backseat of the car and you don’t have to answer to anyone! Being single is great! Who gives a fuck about being bored? Netflix is streaming hoe! Do you really want some dirty nigga snoring in your ear at night, farting on top of you? The arguments over nothing, the ex-girlfriend drama, competing with the Xbox, wondering if he likes you or if he likes the way you ride dick? Before you jumped in a relationship did you ask yourself—What do I really want? You have a million things you want to do with your life, but as soon as the first nigga with tats and a driver’s license hollas at you, your list dwindles down to one. It’s no longer about what you want to do with your life; it’s about what he’s doing… Where he’s at… Why he isn’t calling you… Now you hate men, you hate being in a relationship blah blah fucking blah. You found the lamp, the Genie popped out, you wished that you could see yourself happy. He gives you a picture of yourself in Kindergarten. Now you’re pissed because that wish was a waste. Men are Genies. You can’t be mad at the man for giving you a shitty relationship, you’re the one that asked for it without taking the time to think about what it really meant. What’s worse than being single? Being in a fucked up relationship. Appreciate what you have and stop wishing for something you’re not ready for.



Source: Here

Thursday, 20 October 2011

...its been too serious in this blog so on a lighter note so welcome on Board Proudly Nigerian Airways ..;)))


Hello and Welcome to this blog, pleased you stopped by and hope you enjoy what you read enough to leave a comment..or if you have a blog, a link toyour blog so I can follow you and read from you too....
*Found this on those fwd fwd mails...enjoy :))*


Welcome onboard flight.....
------------------------
Good morning, Ladies and Gentlemen.

This is your captain Boneyface welcoming you on board of Nigeria
Airways.
We apologize for the four-day delay in taking off, it was due to bad
weather and some overtime I had to put in at the bakery.

This is flight 126 to Lagos. Landing in Lagos is not guaranteed, but we
will end up somewhere in the South. If luck is in our favour, we may
even be landing on your village!

Nigeria Airways has an excellent safety-record. In fact our safety
standards are so high that even terrorists are afraid to fly with us!

It is with pleasure, I announce that starting this year over 50% of our
passengers have reached their destination. If our engines are too noisy
for you, on passenger request, we can arrange to turn them off! To make
your free fall to earth pleasant and memorable, we serve complimentary
Bongo tea and Okin biscuits!

For our not-so-religious passengers, we are the only airline who can
help you find out if there really is a God!

We regret to inform you, that today's in-flight movie will not be shown
as we forgot to record it from the television. But for our movie buffs,
we will be flying right next to Air Barka, where their movie will be
visible from the right side of the cabin window.

There is no smoking allowed in this airplane. Any smoke you see in the
cabin is only the early warning system on the engines telling us to slow
down!

In order to catch important landmarks, we try to fly as close as
possible for the best view. If however, we go a little too close, do let
us know. Our enthusiastic co-pilot sometimes flies right through the
landmark!

Kindly be seated, keep your seat in an upright position for take-off and
fasten your seat-belt.
For those of you who can't find a seat-belt, kindly fasten your own belt
to the arm of your seat ... and for those of you who can't find a seat,
do not hesitate to get in touch with a stewardess who will explain how
to fasten yourself to your suitcase."

Wishing yall loads of Love and Laughter
Mena

Thursday, 13 October 2011

YOU ARE WELL FED, WHY CANT YOU LOOK ME IN THE EYE



Hi Peeps, thanks for all the responses, i solemnly swear to reply everyone tomorrow, thanks for your patience xxxx. Enjoy this story...

Hello you don't know my name, where I'm from and where I'm going but the one thing you know is I'm just like you. All you have to do is look me in the eye and you will see.

I'm a grandmother way past retirement age struggling to take care of my grandkids. You see my daughter, their mother abandoned them years ago. Business today is slow, kerosene does'nt sell as much as it used to. I'm tired and hungry that even the mosquitoes feasting on me are a welcome distraction. Rent is way past due, so my grandson will not be resuming school when the new term starts tommorow. I know its hopeless staying a little longer, a little longer waiting here trying to sell when it seems like I'm invincible , a little less time of trying to sleep without electricity. I'm too old for all of this and as terrified as I am that I might not be able to provide my grandkids the bare necessities, I'm more terrified of not waking up one day, in which case they would be left with no one to care for them.
Fear. Who gave it to me. Life gave it to me.

Good evening ma, I can see its a young lady. I must have dosed off.
Mama what are you selling. Na kerosene, small bottle, 100 naira, big one 250, she does'nt like a kerosene customer. Mama, night don reach, wetin you dey do outside this kind time. Abeg, how much for all. I mentally calculated what was left, which was not so easy these days. I would never admit to anyone that my elementary maths was slowly eluding me. My pikin, pay 650. She just stared at me. For a moment sensing my desperation, so I turned away, bring am, she opened her purse and handed me a bundle of 500 naira notes. Mama go house. Night don reach. I dey see you everyday for here. Use this money, then she handed me her card. My house dey near here. Call me next week. I could'nt believe it. Thank you my pikin. God go bless you. I was already choking on my voice. Mama no thank me. I get grandmama too and I no like as I dey see you like this. Make sure say you call me o. She rushed off waving goodbye. I waited until she left before I counted the money. Unbelievable, I quickly picked up my tray, I had to get home. I did'nt want dele to be late for school tommorow. As I hurried home, I wondered why someone I did'nt know would do something like that for me, then I realised that she saw me. I might have thought I was invincible, but there was someone watching. She looked me in the eye and Without speaking, she knew my story.

Beautifully written by Barbara Okojie

Sunday, 9 October 2011

WHAT LORD LUGARD AND MAHATMA GHANDI .THOUGHT ABOUT BLACKS/AFRICANS (oh and Happy Independence day) (Part 2)



Kaf·fir also Kaf·ir (kfr)
n. pl. Kaffir or Kaf·firs also Kafir or Kaf·irs
1. Offensive
a. A Xhosa.
b. often kaffir Used especially in southern Africa as a disparaging term for a Black person.
2. Kafir A Nuristani.
3. also kaffir Islam An infidel source

Hi

This is a continuation of my last blog which focused on Lord Lugard

Today is the turn of Mohandas Karamchand Gandhi (1869-1948). He is known as 'Mahatma' (great soul), Gandhi was the leader of the Indian nationalist movement against British rule, and is widely considered the father of his country. His doctrine of non-violent protest to achieve political and social progress has been hugely influential. After university, he went to London to train as a barrister. He returned to India in 1891 and in 1893 accepted a job at an Indian law firm in Durban, South Africa. Gandhi was appalled by the treatment of Indian immigrants there, and joined the struggle to obtain basic rights for them. During his 20 years in South Africa he was sent to prison many times. Source BBC

I will stop there as I am more interested in Gandhi and South African Blacks: Gandhi wrote extensively about his experiences with the blacks of South Africa. He always termed them “Kaffirs” (refer to first paragraph on this blog) and his writings reveal a deep-seated disdain for these African natives Here are a few of his quotes along with their sources.

“A general belief seems to prevail in the colony that the Indians are little better, if at all, than the savages or natives of Africa. Even the children are taught to believe in that manner, with the result that the Indian is being dragged down to the position of a raw Kaffir.” (Reference: The Collected Works of Mahatma Gandhi, Government of India (CWMG), Vol I, p. 150)

Regarding forcible registration with the state of blacks: “One can understand the necessity for registration of Kaffirs who will not work.” (Reference: CWMG, Vol I, p. 105)

May 22, 1906
“It was a gross injustice to seek to place Indians in the same class as the Kaffirs.” ~ Vol. V, p. 226

“Why, of all places in Johannesburg, the Indian Location should be chosen for dumping down all the Kaffirs of the town passes my comprehension…the Town Council must withdraw the Kaffirs from the Location.” (Reference: CWMG, Vol I, pp. 244-245)

His description of black inmates: “Only a degree removed from the animal.” Also, “Kaffirs are as a rule uncivilized - the convicts even more so. They are troublesome, very dirty and live almost like animals.” - Mar. 7, 1908 (Reference: CWMG, Vol VIII, pp. 135-136)

The Durban Post Office: One of Gandhi’s major “achievements” in South Africa was to promote racial segregation by refusing to share a post office door with the black natives.

Sept. 26, 1896
“Ours is one continual struggle against a degradation sought to be inflicted upon us by the Europeans, who desire to degrade us to the level of the raw Kaffir whose occupation is hunting, and whose sole ambition is to collect a certain number of cattle to buy a wife with and, then, pass his life in indolence and nakedness.” ~ Vol. I, pp. 409-410

I will stop here, see more here, at your leisure

To conclude I will write the same words as I used in the first paragraph of part one;
In primary school it was part of the school curriculum to teach us about great leaders of our past. However as an adult I did some more research on these 'Great Leaders' and what i found out certainly was not part of the school curriculum.

Just saying...
Thanks for reading through...
Mena

Wednesday, 5 October 2011

WHAT LORD LUGARD AND MAHATMA GHANDI .THOUGHT ABOUT BLACKS/AFRICANS (oh and Happy Independence day) (Part 1)


Hi

In primary it was part of the school curriculum to teach us about great leaders of our past. However as an adult I did some more research on these 'Great Leaders' and what i found out certainly was not part of the school curriculum.

Today I introduce you to articles written about two great figures of history Mahatma Ghandi and Lord Lugard and thought to myself at least they had the balls to have it written down and stored forever for people like myself to find out what *possibly* could be the cause of intolerance, rejection and violent crimes all down to the racial structure of a person.

While many Arabs experience 'it' by being automatcally profiled as a terrorist, Africans experience it in all sorts of ways, the latest being a subliminal attempt to erase 'blackness for more acceptable mixed race' from most mainstream channels..I digress... as thats an argument for another day...Lets starts with Lugard, and continue with Ghandi in the second part.
Enjoy the thoughts and words of Lord Lugard

First a brief history; Frederick John Dealtry Lugard, 1st Baron Lugard GCMG, CB, DSO, PC (22 January 1858 – 11 April 1945), known as Sir Frederick Lugard Governor of the two protectorates. His main mission was to complete the amalgamation into one colony. Although controversial in Lagos, where it was opposed by a large section of the political class and the media, the amalgamation did not arouse passion in the rest of the country. From 1914 to 1919, Lugard was made Governor General of the now combined Colony of Nigeria.

Well one day he woke up, eat his two slice of bread served with english breakfast tea,and while sipping got the inspiration to write the following:

"In character and temperament, the typical African of this race-type is a happy, thriftless, excitable person. Lacking in self control, discipline, and foresight. Naturally courageous, and naturally courteous and polite, full of personal vanity, with little sense of veracity, fond of music and loving weapons as an oriental loves jewellery. His thoughts are concentrated on the events and feelings of the moment, and he suffers little from the apprehension for the future, or grief for the past. His mind is far nearer to the animal world than that of the European or Asiatic, and exhibits something of the animals’ placidity and want of desire to rise beyond the State he has reached. Through the ages the African appears to have evolved no organized religious creed, and though some tribes appear to believe in a deity, the religious sense seldom rises above pantheistic animalism and seems more often to take the form of a vague dread of the supernatural"


“He lacks the power of organization, and is conspicuously deficient in the management and control alike of men or business. He loves the display of power, but fails to realize its responsibility ....he will work hard with a less incentive than most races. He has the courage of the fighting animal, an instinct rather than a moral virtue...... In brief, the virtues and defects of this race-type are those of attractive children, whose confidence when it is won is given ungrudgingly as to an older and wiser superior and without envy.......Perhaps the two traits which have impressed me as those most characteristic of the African native are his lack of apprehension and his lack of ability to visualize the future."

Source: Lord Frederick John Dealty Lugard, The Dual Mandate, pg.70 (1926)"


Watch out for part 2

Tuesday, 27 September 2011

PHOTO AND ARTICLE OF THE DAY




LAGOS, Nigeria -- When the sun sets in Nigeria, candle flames dance against the darkness, flashlights bob down empty streets and thousands of diesel generators cough to life.

This nation has more than enough oil and natural gas to satisfy its energy needs, but its power grid is a wreck, reaching less than half the population even on a good day. To frustrated Nigerians, the initials of the state-run electricity provider, the Power Holding Company of Nigeria - stand more aptly for "Please Have Candles Nearby."

Nigerian President Goodluck Jonathan vowed Thursday to set things right by expanding, repairing and privatizing the system - a hugely important issue for the nation of 150 million, IRONICALLY He made the announcement in a luxury Lagos hotel powered around the clock by diesel generators.

The effort will require enormous investment. In a report, Nigerian officials suggested that $100 billion "would represent a conservative estimate" to build new power plants and transmission lines over the next decade.

There haven't been improvements in Nigeria's electrical grid since the 1970s, and its population has almost tripled since then. Former President Olusegun Obasanjo, who governed from 1999-2007 and is a mentor to Jonathan, purportedly spent as much as $16 billion to revamp the power grid - to no visible effect.

Nigerians' cynicism about the situation is as dark as the streets are at night. A survey of businesses conducted by the nation's anti-graft agency found executives rated the national power company less trustworthy than even Nigeria's trigger-happy and bribe-prone federal police. Many of thosE surveyed said they feel obliged to bribe workers to repair power lines or provide electricity.

Employees of the state-run power company went on strike over their salaries but returned to work . But even when workers man their stations, most of the country remains without power.

Some Nigerians steal what little electricity there is. Power poles look like tangled black yarn with illegally spliced lines running in every direction. Workers cut electricity during hard rain, over fears of transformers blowing or poles falling to the ground, their live wires killing passers-by. One such incident left at least 20 dead in February.

Many in Africa's most populous country remain skeptical of ever seeing steady electricity.

"Every day I pray to God ... to give us light," said Cecilia Akpan, a 55-year-old widow who sells cassava at night by candlelight in the capital.

Those who can afford it get by with diesel generators. Those powering office buildings can be the size of boxcars. In humble market stalls and homes, small generators provide enough electricity for a few light bulbs and a fan during humid nights.

In Lagos, a city of 14 million, the growling engines create a monotonous soundtrack, their diesel fumes a noxious perfume. The central bank estimates Nigerians spend $13 billion a year to fuel generators, which together provide more than twice as much electricity as the national power company.

Jonathan's plan calls for privatizing the 11 electrical distribution companies that fall under the power company. Private investment would build new, natural-gas power plants that would rely on Nigeria's ample gas reserves. The government would create a new power grid to carry the additional electricity while contracting a private firm to manage it.

"We need a revolution in the power sector," Jonathan said.

At Lagos' Oshodi Market, a maze of concrete store stalls specializing in electronics, salesmen scamper to their rooftops to pour more oil mixed with fuel into their small generators, which provide just enough power for lights. Only one stall - the generator store - had enough juice to run a flat-screen television, which blared music videos.

Fueling a small generator costs about $10 a day in country where most earn less than $1 in the same time, noted Anthony Okeke, the market's vice chairman.

"We use the profit to buy the fuel," Okeke said.

Those at the market have relative comfort compared to most Nigerians. In rural pasturelands, fires light the night in homes, just like in ancient times. In the city, street hawkers like Akpan sell their wares by candlelight, their faces illuminated only by passing headlights.

Less than a mile away from the market, meanwhile, generators at compounds owned by the country's political and business elite chug into the night, powering security lights on empty parking lots.

"Poor people, we are suffering in Nigeria," Akpan said. "It is only the rich people who are enjoying Nigeria."

SOURCE: ASSOCIATED PRESS
http://www.miamiherald.com/2010/08/26/1793619/oil-rich-but-candlelit-nigeria.html
Mena

Sunday, 25 September 2011

ENGAGED but SINGLE by guest blogger Femi Job




Hi!!!

Many men and ladies too are in exactly this situationn! Whcih situaion? read on:

This is a true story. It is about a lady and her efforts to find Mr right. Ladies say that 9 out of 10 guys are wrong (of course this is not true). Chidimma (not real name) is (currently) engaged to a guy called Ugo (not real name). I know Chidimma personally, but I do not really know Ugo. Chidimma lives in Houston, Texas whereas Ugo lives in Baltimore, Maryland. Chidimma works as a sales associate at WalMart Stores (location: Houston) whereas Ugo is a student at Towson University, Maryland.


Chidimma met Ugo at a 'naija' party in Dallas, Texas (in December 2008). He 'toasted' her and she fell for him. They started going out in January 2009, and they got engaged in October 2009. It's a 'good' long distance relationship, but it works for them (who said long distance doesn't work?). On her facebook account (Chidimma is my friend on facebook), her relationship status (currently) is 'SINGLE'. In February of this year, I had this conversation with her in Houston.


Me: Chidi-mama, how you dey now?

Chidimma: Jobeeee, I dey fine oh, you nko?

Me: I dey o...

Chidimma: I dey always gbadun your moves for facebook o, all those your controversial status updates. Hahahahaha! I dey always laff tire!
Me: You know me now...Oh, by the way, I get person wey wan know you oh. I get friend wey like you. He saw your picture and he's never going to be the same again until he meets you oh. I told him I will check to see if you are available.

Chidimma: Really? that's good oh! Before I can know if I am available or not, I have to find out about the guy now! Tell me about am - wetin be him name? where him dey work? where him live? how him look?

Me: well, you know say I no know whether guys are fine or not, but him dey ok sha. Na Ibo boy o. Him name na Chuks. Na Chevron him dey work for here in Houston. Na Houston him dey live!

Chidimma: I AM AVAILABLE. Tell him I am 'single' and 'available'. You can tell him to add me on facebook. Jobeeeeee, you get real person oh! Chei, see as my leg dey shake sef! You get him picture?

Me: E dey my facebook...(pause)....ummmm, so I take it you don break up with your fiance Ugo. Wetin happen now?

Chidimma: NO oh! Who tell you say I don break up with Ugo. We still dey engaged!

Me: but...you just said you were SINGLE and AVAILABLE! you dey confuse me big time oh!

Chidimma: Jobeeee, you suppose understand now! Free me small now!!! If na wo-wo guy wey no get money you introduce me, I go be seriously ENGAGED, but as you introduce fine hardworking engineer to me, I dey SINGLE. (pauses)...e sound somehow abi?

Me: Odikwa serious gbasky o....chei...eeewo......nnem nnem udu ma rapota mo udu (Ibo song of hope)

Chidimma: See, IT'S LIKE THIS - I am ENGAGED to Ugo, but until I am MARRIED to him - I am technically SINGLE. We have both discussed this and he knows about my status on facebook. So, if I see someone better, I will break up with him...(pauses)....I am with him because I don't want to be ALONE. I am 30 years old Jobeeee, all my friends are married or engaged or in a relationship. So, I don't want to BLOW my chance of finding the right guy, and so if the right guy comes my way, I AM SINGLE AND AVAILABLE, if the WRONG guy comes my way, I AM ENGAGED.

Me: OK O

Chidimma: Jobeeeeeeeeeeeeeee....!!!!!

copyright* FEMI JOB,


Now I say as long as you are not married, even if you are engaged, especially all those 2yrs plus 'engagment', you can keep as many potentials around, but not SLEEP with them, while my altruistic youngest sister believes once you are engaged you keep off all other potentials, what say you???

Mena

Wednesday, 21 September 2011

FIVE BOYS GANG RAPE FEMALE STUDENTS OF ABIA STATE UNIVERSITY:- as narrated by Linda Ikeji


I just came across this evil barbaric story and just couldnt help but share, a lady was raped for 2 days. My biggest problem with this is what actions will eventually be taken, will justice be served or will they get away with it as is normal in lawless barbaric fatally paternalistic society like Nigeria?

Read on


And the photo you see was taken by her (Linda's) camera and the rest of the note is from her blog, source immediately after.

FIVE BOYS GANG RAPE FEMALE STUDENTS OF ABIA STATE UNIVERSITY:- as narrated by Linda Ikeji
My whole weekend messed up. I saw a video that has messed with my head. A rape video. One hour of five boys taking turns on a girl. So heartbreaking to watch! One woman I showed it to today cried for three hours straight...it's one of the worst things I've ever seen in my life



A female student was gang raped by five boys in Abia State University. This incident happened Tuesday August 16th , 2011. These boys raped this girl, recorded it, passed it round their friends, who then passed it round ABSU campus.



And do you know what her offense was, why this girl was raped? She supposedly insulted one of the boys...that was all.



In the rape video, which lasts for over an hour, the girl cried her eyes out and tried to fight them off in the first few minutes, after a while they subdued her; by slapping her, rough handling her, threatening to kill her and having rough sex with her. After a while she gave in and instead of fighting, she started pleading, and after her pleas fell on deaf ears, she begged them to kill her that she couldn’t take the pain anymore. These boys laughed at her, made fun of her and told her that if she didn't co-operate, they would keep her in the room and continue raping her for two days.



Then she starts mentioning names, saying ‘What did I ever do to you’, (they spoke in English and Igbo language) she mentioned at least two names.



And in between, you will hear her scream out in pain as one guy stands up and another penetrates her...and all the while, these boys are laughing.



In the video, you can clearly see the girl’s face; the boys faces you really can’t see clearly... but they talk a lot and one of them said he’s a 4th year law student, another one said he’s an IT student...names were mentioned...these boys can be fished out.



This girl is someone’s daughter, someone’s sister, someone’s friend, and God’s creation. You cannot do this to another human being and get away with it.



I have the video...one hour of it on my laptop, and 10 minutes of it on my phone...but the rape was more than an hour, she went through this ordeal for several hours. Uploading this video online is not an option, but I want people who can do something about this to see it.



These boys can’t get away with this. Please if there’s any Women Rights Group, police, lawyers, journalists, who can take this up, please contact me; I will bring the video to you, wherever you are or send via email...see more at.. http://lindaikeji.blogspot.com/2011/09/five-boys-gang-rape-female-student-of.html

Monday, 19 September 2011

A NIGERIAN LOVE/HATE STORY- 'pending on your perspective :)


Hi there. Not been such a good and faithfully employee bcos my health has just been crazy. Was ill wednesday. Felt better on friday, then on Saturday I was so ill I got up from my bed to get a glass of water and fell on the floor ill with cramps, couldnt move, my phones were ringing couldnt pick it up till help came, was rushed to maitama hospital....given injetions felt better and was told to come back together for some lab test. Went there after dropping my bag at work to see very sick people all waiting to do similar tests as mine or other tests in general. Very rude lab assistants shouting at ill patients, very tired medical personnel to tired to show where the right offices where located the best they could do was a toss of their head. etc etc. Waited for a long time for my blood to be taken, infact missed a lot of office hours and still couldnt finish the whole samples to be taken from me , will finish do some more tomorrow *dreading it*...my point being that, isnt there a more efficient way for things to be done???? My guest blogger speaks Nigeria as a nation in limbo..enjoy

A Nation in Limbo, A People at AkimboIt is a ward meeting of the biggest political party in the country, a country that boasts huge natural resources which includes oil, tourmaline, gold, tin, copper etc, and huge agricultural potentials with weather and soil in different regions that can grow virtually anything required. The ward meeting has in attendance members of the local community, the next election is near and they have come to discuss their nominations for political offices ranging from ward councillors to the presidency. Potential candidates are in attendance, they have come to discuss their plans with the community members and tell them how they intend to develop the community if elected into office.

Bola walks down the road, his girlfriend Aisha is around for the weekend, they just returned from the swimming pool at the VGC residents club and were taking a stroll on this beautiful Saturday afternoon. They see a group of people gathered in a building and his girlfriend asks him what is going on, I don’t know he replies, I rarely walk past here, I drive past and didn’t even know that building existed. They walk back home and relax, it will soon be 9pm and they will be meeting up with some friends at newscafe for some drinks before heading out for the night.

The ward meeting has ended, they are chattering as they return, each man to his own abode, the market woman to her stall, the area father to his gang of area boys, the barber to his shop, the okada rider to his queue, the bus driver to his garage. They are all uneducated and look toutish, shouting and singing songs of loyalty to their great party, afterall it is the biggest political party in Africa . The aspirants are well dressed and look out of place, but they have learnt to live amongst these people, they share banters with them and crack jokes. They have just concluded a very important meeting, and the atmosphere seems to favour them.

Bola and Aisha are back by 4am on Sunday morning, they see a group of area boys sleeping by the road next to Bola’s gate, they drive past them and go home to sleep, it was an eventful night, they had plenty to drink, Aisha danced till she almost dropped, they slept, it was Monday morning again, on the way to work Bola curses the Lagos bad roads and wonders what the local governments are doing with all the money they get, bunch of touts and thieves Aisha replied, he drops her off at work and goes to his office. Nobody is working, the generator has broken down, the blackmarket diesel they bought was fake, he curses PHCN for making entrepreneurship difficult, his PA says they should be scrapped, bunch of idiots.

It is another Saturday, the aspirants have done as agreed, the community make their way to the ward meeting, they are dressed roughly, the market women smelling of fish, the okada riders haven’t had a bath in weeks, they get to the meeting and want to know how much each aspirant has brought, the Ghana must go bags of money are brought in and shared, the okada riders association chairman takes the share for him and his boys, the market women leader takes for her and her people, same goes for the bus drivers chairman, the area father, the barbers association, plumbers association, mechanics association etc. The aspirant with the most money is selected; they sing his praises and promise to do everything to crown him the winner of any election.

Sunday night, Aisha is on facebook, her friend Chinelo changes her facebook status and says Nigerian politicians are thieves, there are many comments, Aisha joins in on the debate, she spends the whole evening exchanging banters about how bad the Nigerian government is, she says we need a revolution, her friend Chinelo says no we need prayers, the thread ends, they both have to go to bed, they have to be up by 4am tomorrow to beat traffic, Chinelo curses the government for not making alternative roads, Aisha supports her views, calls Bola to tell him how much she loves him and misses him, Bola says he loves her too and misses her, he promises to take her to Dubai on his next leave, so they can have time alone to themselves. They both go to bed.

It is election day tomorrow, the anointed candidates make their last appearances in the community, Ghana must go bags are moving around, very high police presence, the community members are discussing their candidates, they have all gotten about N1000 each and had sold their votes even before election day.

It is election day tomorrow, an extra public holiday for Bola and Aisha, they go to Obudu cattle ranch, it is a lot fun, wow, this guy tried for Calabar says Aisha, I even wonder why we didn’t wait in Lagos to vote, Bola answers nonchalantly, this nation is in a state of limbo, there is no need wasting our time over votes that wont count. Aisha slept with a heavy heart, with Bola’s statement on her mind… A NATION IN A STATE OF LIMBO.

They sleep into election day, but Aisha cannot sleep, she wakes up at 3am and taps Bola, he grunts and asks why his baby is not sleeping, she tells him they have to pick the first flight to Lagos tomorrow, Bola sits up startled, we still have the whole weekend he says, yes, but we have to vote Bola, you say Nigeria is a nation in a state of Limbo, but we ourselves are standing at akimbo, we need to play our parts and vote, your votes will never count squirms Bola, at least we will have voted says Aisha. First thing in the morning, they were in Lagos , and they voted.

It is election day, the market women are out, the okada riders are out, area father mobilizes his area boys, bus drivers association chairman mobilizes his boys, they are singing in support of their candidates, they are still relishing the many wads of naira that has been shared, they vote, wait and watch you vote, fight anybody who tries to take a ballot box that doesn’t belong to their candidate, they are joking and laughing with the policemen, they carry the empty ballot boxes after voting, and stuff it with illegal votes in favour of their candidate, they sing songs of loyalty about the anointed candidate.

Election results are out, the anointed candidates have won, Bola calls Aisha, you just wasted our weekend he shouts, I told you our votes will not count. His driver is washing his car and hears him, oga leave that tin he says, whish kain vote u dey talk, vote wey dem decide finish for ward meeting 2 weeks ago, u no dey see dem for ward meeting for down the road, why una sef no go there go talk una own, una go come dey shout. Bola went back indoors and fell into a deep thought, we were never a part of the process, so we couldn’t even ensure credible candidates got to be party candidates, he went back out and asked his driver what is usually discussed in this ward meeting, nothing o replies the driver, na jus moni dem dey share for us for dia, dis one don finish now, na till next election b dat.

Bola and Aisha meet for dinner at Golden Gates restaurant in Ikoyi, they discuss the topic, and wonder if they could make a difference, attend local ward meetings, insist on aspirants having a manifesto, speak up against the sharing of money, educate these community members on the importance of not selling your vote, vote and mingle with the community members to know how votes are filtered away, become a part of the process and not just a wasteful voter. Bola said he could never get so low as mingling with such people, they are touts and unreasonable he says, Aisha said she was ready to do it, Bola watched her as she ate her chicken, he was deeply in love, he told her how much he loved her, told her that her determination is one of the things that draws him to her, he went down on his knees, and brings out a small box from his pocket, my love, Aisha, will you marry me he says as he opens the box to reveal a sparkling diamond ring… YES YES, screams Aisha, tears rolling down her cheeks as he slips the ring onto her finger, she pulls him up and gives him a very long kiss, I have always dreamt of this day she whispered in his ears, I want to be your wife, I want you to be the mother of my kids he whispers. They dine and drink a bottle of red wine, then head home. It was 11pm.


A lorry is parked right on the road, no illumination and Bola runs into it, he swerves and was lucky enough, what silly country without rules is this he shouts, Aisha reminds him he is standing at akimbo and complaining, you have to get involved she says, look to your right and left she tells him, totally dark, no electricity in the houses, no street light on the roads, it is not the government’s fault Bola, it is our fault for condoning it she says, unemployed youth are into robbery and this darkness even gives them a place to operate she reminds him, we need to get involved and do our part to save our country, Bola listens and drives on, suddenly he sees a flash, sticks and rods hit the car.. STOP STOP or I’ll shoot they scream, he screeches past as Aisha screams and shouts, gun shots rent the air, wow.. and you just mentioned it that thieves could be here he says, wow, this our akimbo and lackadaisical attitude towards dis naija na everybody go suffer am o, baby, I will join u and become more involved in Nigeria he says, there is no reply, baby he calls, still speeding down the road, no reply, he switches on the inner light and sees Aisha covered in blood, baby he screams and races towards hospital, please answer me he says trying to shake her, please wake up.

He drives into the hospital and there are no doctors on duty, they are on strike, no wheelchairs so the nurses manage to carry Aisha with their hands into the ward, the only doctor who managed to come to work against the strike strolls in, he is exhausted, please save her Bola begs, we just got engaged tonight, please she is my life, she is still alive the doctor says, but she has sustained a bullet wound to her neck and has lost a lot of blood, she needs blood and we don’t have blood here, you have to take her to the next hospital, where is the ambulance driver, he is nowhere to be found, there is no light so it isn’t easy to find him, everybody is screaming his name, he comes and says he doesn’t have fuel, Bola should bring money for fuel, cant we use my car Bola screams, shivering, oh why didn’t u say you came with a car since says one of the nurses who helped bring Aisha out of the car, they rush her back into the car and Bola races towards the next hospital… Aisha died on the way.

If only there was adequate security, if only there were doctors on duty, if only there was blood in the blood bank, if only there was fuel in the ambulance… If only… If only… If only we all got involved in the Nigerian project and make it work. My people, if you ignore Nigeria , you will be a victim one day. Together we can build this nation. Now is the time! Time to start holding our government accountable and make sure our kids and grandkids see a Nigeria they will be proud of. Nobody will do it for us; we have to do it ourselves. As Oga Kalu says, it is our problem, we have to fix it.

I know of two great platforms you can join to become a part of the change you want to see, Join the Transform Nigeria Movement and Arise Nigeria Group today.

Transform Nigeria Movement (http://www.facebook.com/home.php?#!/group.php?gid=58374855775&ref=ts or http://www.yourgovt.com/)

Arise Nigeria (http://www.arisenigeria.org/)

nb: All names used are fictitious, a result of the writer’s imaginations.

Written by guest blogger Ifeoluwa Adebayo


Agree with him or have some issues with his write up? speak forth *er in this case, comment* or forever hold your peace.lol

Mena