THINGS THAT GO BUMP IN THE NIGHT

*Alleged* true article I saw online of an encounter....DO NOT READ ALONE IN THE DARK ;)


Before I begin let me give you a quick rundown of my background before this series of events.

I was a typical rebellious teenager, kicked out of my parents house at the age of 17. At that time my life was at a low point. A friend and I began researching local legends and the paranormal out of boredom really. Nothing real exciting, lost graveyard exploring in the middle of the night, ouija board, and mostly just a strong interest in the occult. We did experience a few scary events, but the overall feeling that we had opened ourselves up to something horrible is what scared us the most. In particular, I remember the feeling of being vulnerable and the feeling like there was something terrible out there and it knew who I was.

FYI, I decided to tell my story this morning because I woke up thinking about this experience and I think I'm only now truly understanding what it was.

At the time of my experiences I was married to my ex-wife and we had two very young children together.

Here we go, the first night of my series of experience went something like this......I was up late on my computer. At the time I was still in college taking some online classes. My computer desk was situated in my bedroom on the opposite wall of the doorway. So, if you were to sit at my computer, your back would face the doorway into my room. It had to have been after midnight, perhaps much later. I was the only soul awake in our apartment, the lights were off, and the only sounds in the home were of my fingers punching the keys on my keyboard. Suddenly, a child's voice came from directly behind me. "Daddy." It was loud, and scared me half to death. I whipped around expecting to see that one of my little ones had gotten out of bed, but there was noone there. I couldn't believe it. Clearly I had heard something. It was plain as day. I hurried into my kids room and there they were. Both of them sound asleep in their beds.

The next morning I told my Mary (ex-wife) about what had happened. She quickly told me I must have been tired and should have gone to bed earlier. I also had entertained that exhaustion must have been the culprit. I went about my day having for the most part let go of the idea.

A few nights later I heard a loud band on either the front door or a wall in the living room. It wasn't like someone's knuckles making the tell-tale sounds of a knock, more like a bang. We lived in an old apartment complex on the edge of a vast field on the edge of town. Our apartment was on the bottom floor with a vacant floor above us. There was no lighting other than a small porch light which always made us nervous coming home at night because it would have been the perfect ambush spot for a robber. So, hearing the bang in the living room was a sure sign that someone was trying to break-in. I grabbed my shotgun, woke up Mary, and she had her cell phone ready to call the police as I checked out the apartment. There was noone at the front door. The kids were sound asleep, we went to bed.

A few nights later, having put the events behind me I had gone to bed. I awoke in the middle of the night hearing something...I put the shotgun next to the bed.

The next evening Mary, the kids, and I had made a pallet on the floor in the living room and were watching a movie as a family. Mary was laying in front of me and was sound asleep halfway through the movie. At one point I rolled over to see the kids had fallen asleep on the pallet between me and the couch. Towards the end of the movie I heard a commotion in my children's room. It was the sounds of movement-activated toys that begin playing songs and sounds when you shake them or bump them. Immediately, I realized that my two year old must have gotten up from behind me and wandered into his room to play. A smile came to my face with the thought. Suddenly, a dark shape darted across the living room, into my room, from the kid's room. I rolled over, both kids sound asleep. This whole incident from the toy sounds, to the shape darting across the room, to my realization that it wasn't one of my children, occured in just a few seconds. Again, I investigated. Tonight the kids would sleep in my bedroom floor on a pallet of blankets.

At this point, Mary still doesn't believe me so I tell my younger brother who isn't sure what to believe. He decides to come spend the night at my house. I am sound asleep when I wake up to someone knocking on my bedroom door. It's my brother. I open my door, he just wanted to let me know that one of my kid's is awake and wandering the apartment and it woke him up. Confused, I asked what he was talking about? He replied that one of my kids was saying, "Daddy" and it woke him up, and I needed to check on my kids. The problem was that my kids were safe and sound and asleep on a pallet in my floor. They had fallen asleep in my bedroom watching tv earlier in the evening and we kept them in the room so my brother could sleep in their room.

Now I have someone that believes me. Over the next few weeks more things happen. Strange things. One afternoon I emerged from my room to find that my daughter was asleep in the sink in the kids bathroom? Somewhere I have a picture of it. Probably on the hard drive of my old PC that crashed. Another evening I came home from work to find Mary asleep in our bedroom and my daughter asleep on the kitchen tabletop? Also, by this time the kids no longer slept in their room, and I had developed a fear of going into the children't bathroom. I was especially scared to look into that bathroom mirror.

One night, I woke up hearing something at my bedroom door. My doorknob was turning, I could see it plain as day. Thankfully, it was locked. Same story, the kids were asleep in the floor on a mountain of blankets and pillows, Mary was asleep, and I'm grabbing for the shotgun. I woke up Mary, who at this point she just rolls her eyes in disbelief. As I grab the still door-knob it twists in my hand. Obviously, this scared the sh#& out of me. A few minutes later I get the courage to have Mary rip the door open with my shotgun trained on the door opening. Nothing there but the blackness of the living room.

I should explain that through this entire event our marraige had been deteriorating. There were fights, yelling, arguing between us. Also, my curiosity of these events led me to think about it a lot. I was back to researching similar stories on the internet. I also found myself watching a lot of horror movies, it was like that was all I wanted to do. I was truly terrifiyed by the situation I was in, my marriage was dissolving, but horror movies seemed like a good idea.

She spoke with a chaplain at the Air Force base that she worked at. He mentioned a simalar story that he had dealt with before. He specifically asked if we were dabling in the occult or watching horror movies. He also specifically asked if there was much anger in the home, and if our relationship was struggling. He told her the child's voice I was hearing saying "Daddy" was no child, but an imposter posing as a child.

Now she was also scared.

The fighting continued as we continued to fall apart. I began finding reasons to leave home.

The last occurance happened one evening as I was leaving to go meet my brother to do some fishing. I left the apartment and began walking to my truck. I had the urge to turn around as if someone was following me. In the window of the second story apartment above our I saw something....It was the face. It was utterly horrifying. It was staring right at me and it had a smile on it face. I can only describe it as an ashen face, or like a really dark face that had appeared to have a white make-up on. Minimal, or no lips with a mouth full of crooked teeth. If you have seen the movie 'the exorcist' the it would be similar to the face that appears briefly on the wall of one of the rooms when they turn the lights off. I tried to explain it away at first, but the apartment was vacant. The face turned as I walked backwards towards my truck, following my movement. It was clearly watching me with its creepy smile. I got in my truck and did a once around the block drive. I came back home and it was no longer in the window.

I'm not sure why that apartment above us was always vacant. At one point there were people living there...briefly. They were constantly screaming and arguing.

Anyway, we got a divorce. Life has moved on. I have had more scary experience sorta follow me wherever I go. I could go on for days...lol.

Anyways...believe me or don't. I don't really care. It happened to me, and it happens to many people. There were many other things that occured to me during this time. I only stated the parts that were still vivid enough to give an account in detail. However, I remember the entire few months in my life as living in fear.....

LTL

P.S: The Ouija board has long since been destroyed. As a matter of fact it was home-made by some friends of mine, and I. It was something we played around with prior to my demonic encounters. I believe that I made myself a target so to speak by using it. Or, I opened a doorway that allowed them to get at me. This was several years ago, We have all since moved on....

I think if you go looking for something the ways that I did then you will find them...or they will find you

LIFE'S CHOICE (5)

Hi, Please click for life's choice 1, life's choice 2, life's choice 3-4 for the earlier stories on Love Under Water by Femi Job

Enjoyyy ;)


The baby started having very severe seizures. One of the nurses was speaking in tongues and casting and binding the demon of epilepsy while the other nurse was looking for a spoon to push into the baby’s mouth. As the nurses gathered round the spectacle, only one nurse had the chutzpah to call the doctor. The doctor came and observed that this was a tonic–clonic seizure – a type of generalized seizure that affects the entire brain. He quickly ordered the nurses to insert intravenous lines, and he administered a dose of phenobarbitone. Then the seizures stopped. Abeke seemed to be in deep sleep.

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Doctor: Where is this child’s father?

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Nurse #1: He already left. He was angry when he left. He left after seeing you. Which kind of man leaves a child in a hospital and just leaves? O ma ga o (translation – it is tall….no…it is serious)

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Doctor; Oh, Mr Yomi Onikoyi…do you have his number? You have to call him to let him know that his daughter is still here and she needs medical intervention.

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Yomi was calm now. His phone was ringing, but he didn’t pick it. He had thought of many things on his way. He wondered, for instance, how he would get some acid from his car battery – he was thinking of pouring this on his wife’s body. He wondered also, where he could get a very sharp machete to hack her to pieces. Perhaps, he thought, he would just strangle her. But by the time he reached home, he was exhausted from ‘thinking’. He entered the house. Lola greeted him, smiling, as he came in.

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Lola: Where is Abeke?

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Yomi: She is at the hospital.

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Lola: Which hospital? Was she admitted?

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Yomi: I don’t know if she was admitted or not, but she is at the hospital?

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Lola (panicking, raising her voice): Which hospital? Which hospital?

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Yomi: I can’t remember the name of the hospital. I think the name starts with ‘M’.

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Lola: You left our daughter in a hospital and you can’t remember the name? ARE YOU MAD?

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Yomi: Our daughter? I didn’t leave my daughter in any hospital o. I don’t have any daughter. I left a bastard in a hospital that I do not care to remember.

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At his outburst, Lola stopped. She wondered why he was suddenly hostile to Abeke, and then she suspected that he knows the truth. BUT she had to be sure that he knew.

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Lola: I don’t know what you are talking about.

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Yomi; Liar! Whore! Harlot! Prostitute! You think I do not know that I am not Abeke’s father? Do I look like a total fool to you? àsírí ti tú (translation – the secret is out).

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Lola (begins to cry): I was going to tell you but I didn’t know how to. I was raped. I am a victim here.

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Yomi: haaa! O ti tún bère iró (translation – you have started another concoction of lies). If you were raped, why didn’t you tell me? Why didn’t you tell me before we married. If I remember correctly, you came to meet me and told me that you were pregnant for me, and then I did the right thing and married you.

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Lola: If I told you I was raped, I was afraid that you wouldn’t marry me again.

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Yomi: But you continued lying. You falsified Abeke’s genotype to keep me in the dark about your evil scheme. Anyway, mo ti so tè mi (translation – I have said my own). I want you out of this house within the next one hour. Go and pack all your things, and all the things of your bastard too. I will leave now and come back in one hour. I will come back with a machete and with acid. If I find you here, I will hack you to pieces and burn you with acid. Is that clear?

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Lola looked into his eyes as he said this, and she could see nothing but cold detachment. It was then that she realized that he was serious. She got on her knees and started crying and pleading with him. But he would have none of it. When she realized he wasn’t going to forgive her, she stopped pleading.

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Lola: I will go. But tell me which hospital you left my daughter in. I have to know where my daughter is.

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Yomi ignored her and made for the door to leave the house. She followed him and stopped in his path. She again demanded to know where her daughter was. He pushed her away and continued walking, she recovered and pushed back. She pushed a little too hard. He hit his head hard against the wall and slumped on the ground and was unconscious. She thought she had killed him and tried to rouse him, but he was unconscious. She tried to listen for a heartbeat and feel for a pulse but there were none. Had she killed him? She was in trouble. She had to call for help – the only name that came into her head was Akin. She decided she would lie to him that her husband suffered a heart attack and then tell him the truth when he came by. She picked up the phone and dialed Akin’s number. As the phone was ringing, she was muttering under her breath the same words over and over again.

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ABEKE, where are you?

(fade)

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Akin: There is something I want to tell you…..

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But just then the phone rang and it was Wale. Funmi excused herself and walked some distance away to engage in some intimate talk. Akin watched her walk away and shook his head. She noticed that he did this and filed it away in her mind to ask him later why he did. The phone call lasted for about 20 minutes and she came back to the table.

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Funmi: sorry, it was my sweetheart who called. So you wanted to tell me something?

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Just then the phone rang again – it was Dupe. Funmi and Dupe talked for just a little bit. The conversation wasn’t very pleasant. As Funmi was talking with Dupe, Akin’s phone rang - it was Lola.

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Lola (screaming): Please help me!

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Akin: Omolola, what is it?

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Lola: It’s my husband o…I think he’s dead. He’s not moving!

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Akin: Calm down, take deep breaths. Tell me what happened!

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Lola: He came back to the house, and we had a very intense argument. He was screaming when he suddenly held his chest in pain and dropped to the floor. I have been trying to wake him up. You are the only doctor I know. Please help me.

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Akin: I think he may have had a heart attack. I will send the ambulance to your house right away. Please stay on the line.

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Akin kept her on hold, while he made another call. Funmi had already angrily ‘cut’ the phone connection with Dupe and she could see from Akin’s tone that the phone call was of a very serious nature and so she was silent. Akin kept the ambulance service on hold, while he switched back to Lola.

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Akin: Lola, the ambulance is on its way. Now, listen carefully to me, I want you to do the following - lie Yomi on his back, check that nothing is obstructing his airways , listen for his breathing - listen with your ear just over his mouth for breathing…Is he breathing?

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NO RESPONSE.

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Wale rolled off Dupe. He had just had a series of convulsive shudders that signaled the end of this ‘exercise regimen’. Dupe called them her exercise regimen and Wale was ‘helping’ her to try to lose weight. Dupe had already fallen off the cliff more than once within this ‘session’ – 3 times actually. It was always ‘multiples’ with Wale. And now, they were both lying down on the bed in the hotel room. YES, they had just had an intense ‘workout’ schedule – Dupe had read somewhere that intense sexual activity helped to burn calories. Dupe passed the cigarette to Wale and he took a puff. He started humming a popular christian song.

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Dupe: Wale, I haven’t seen my period!

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Wale: What does that matter to me?

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Dupe: It means that I may be pregnant!

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Wale: That’s good right? You know what to do – if you want it you keep it, if you don’t want it, you lose it….very simple! End of discussion!

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Dupe: Is that all you have to say?

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Wale: What do you want me to say? That I am very happy? You want me to get up and start dancing? Normally I use protection when I have sex; it was you who insisted you wanted it ‘raw and natural’. So (pauses), it is your fault you got pregnant, not mine!

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Dupe: I just told you that I may be carrying your child and you are talking about abortion?

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Wale: OK, what do you want me to say? OK, no abortion. You can go home and sleep with your husband and tell him that he is about to become a father.

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Dupe: But he will know – we haven’t had sex in a very long time.

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Wale: Then you have to ‘force’ him, you are a woman aren't you? Use your 'persuasive' skills and your body. That is the only way that you can cover up your adultery. You are guilty of adultery, not me. I am not married yet - so I am not guilty of any adultery. You are the wife of a deacon, not me! And right now, (you), you are in a hotel room with another man. You have defiled your matrimonial bed. You are a very 'nasty' woman. Exodus 20:14 says that ‘you shall not commit adultery’. So my advice is simple – go home when you leave here, and ‘do’ your husband and when the pregnancy starts to show, tell him that it is his own…or else ‘remove it’. I can get my friend Akin to help you remove it discreetly if you want.

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Dupe: If I am nasty, what are you?

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Wale: I am just a man trying to help you lose weight -- out of concern for your health and out of the goodness of my heart.

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Dupe was silent. She wasn’t talking anymore. She was thinking of how she was going to get her husband to make love to her tonight.

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Chigozie still felt bad. He was going to try to be nice to his wife tonight to serve as expiation for his peccadilloes. He needed to atone. He placed the bible over his heart and then over his loins and started to speak in tongues.

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Chigozie (praying inwardly): GOD help me. SAVE me from that woman. I bind and I cast Tayo into the lake of fire in Jesus’ name!

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But he wasn’t praying with conviction. He was still remembering how Tayo had ravaged his body and his body was responding. His trouser was swollen and he used his bible to cover it again. Oh, Dupe would get home soon, he must be ready. Chigozie quickly took viagra - medicine that would make him 'potent' when his wife was around - he normally wasn't responsive to her. Thirty minutes later, Dupe came home.

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Chigozie: Modupe, welcome home. Where have you been?

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Dupe: I was at the gym, working out, trying to lose some weight so that you can notice me again, my dear husband. I miss you so much (starts crying).

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Chigozie (embraces Dupe) Stop crying! I miss you too.

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They were in very close proximity and their bodies were touching. Dupe kissed him, almost tentatively. Chigozie did not resist. They locked their lips in a ‘french kiss’ for what seemed like a long minute and then Chigozie tried to carry her, but he couldn’t – she was too heavy – and so, he led her by the hand to the bedroom.

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It was time for atonement, he thought, time to do the right thing. It was time for sex, she thought, and if she was already pregnant, it was time for her to give her baby a father.
Please click for life's choice (6)

HEALTH TIP: ~~DRINK WATER ON EMPTY STOMACH~~

;It is popular in Japan today to drink water immediately after waking up every morning. Further more, scientific tests have proven its value.We publish below a description of use of water for our readers. For old and serious diseases as well as modern illnesses the water treatment had been found successful by a Japanese medical society as a 100% cure for the following diseases: Headache, body ache, heart system, arthritis, fast heart beat, epilepsy, excess fatness, bronchitis asthma, TB, meningitis, kidney and urine diseases,vomiting, gastritis, diarrhea, piles, diabetes, constipation, all eye diseases, womb, cancer and menstrual disorders, ear nose and throat diseases.

METHOD OF TREATMENT 1. As you wake up in the morning before brushing teeth, drink 4 x 160ml glasses of water
2. Brush and clean the mouth but do not eat or drink anything for 45 minute
3.. After 45 minutes you may eat and drink as normal.
4. After 15 minutes of breakfast, lunch and dinner do not eat or drink anything for 2 hours
5. Those who are old or sick and are unable to drink 4 glasses of water at the beginning may commence by taking little water and gradually increase it to 4 glasses per day.
6. The above method of treatment will cure diseases of the sick and others can enjoy a healthy life. The following list gives the number of days of treatment required to cure/control/reduce main diseases: 1. High Blood Pressure (30 days) 2. Gastric (10 days) 3. Diabetes (30 days) 4. Constipation (10 days) 5. Cancer (180 days) 6. TB (90 days) 7. Arthritis patients should follow the above treatment only for 3 days in the 1st week, and from 2nd week onwards – daily

..


This treatment method has no side effects,however at the commencement of treatment you may have to urinate a few times. It is better if we continue this and make this procedure as a routine work in our life. Drink Water and Stay healthy and Active. This makes sense .. The Chinese and Japanese drink hot tea with their meals not cold water. May be it is time we adopt their drinking habit while eating!!! Nothing to lose, everything to gain... For those who like to drink cold water, this article is applicable to you. It is nice to have a cup of cold drink after a meal. However, the cold water will solidify the oily stuff that you have just consumed. It will slow down the digestion. Once this 'sludge' reacts with the acid, it will break down and be absorbed by the intestine faster than the solid food. It will line the intestine.Very soon, this will turn into fats and lead to cancer. It is best to drink hot soup or warm water after a meal.

A serious note about heart attacks: ·Women should know that not every heart attack symptom is going to be the left arm hurting, · Be aware of intense pain in the jaw line. · You may never have the first chest pain during the course of a heart attack. · Nausea and intense sweating are also common symptoms. · 60% of people who have a heart attack while they are asleep do not wake up. Pain in the jaw can wake you from a sound sleeLet's be careful and be aware. The more we know,the better chance we could survive...

A cardiologist says if everyone who gets this mail sends it to everyone they know, you can be sure that we'll save at least one. Please copy and paste to people you know. Good luck with the tip.

LIFE'S CHOICE (3 AND 4)

HiPlease click here for part 1 and Part 2 Here is the third and fourth part of Love Under Water by Femi Job..Enjoy xxx

WILL YOU MARRY ME?

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The loving words seemed to echo around the room, wrapping everyone within it in a sudden embrace. The reactions (to the words) were as divergent as they could possibly be and were in accordance with emotions that ranged from indescribable joy to disconcerting shock. Some people in the room were just merely surprised while others found (within this context) the words to be the most uncomfortable words they had ever heard. The world seemed to stand still, but just for a moment. The lights in the room seemed to focus on the words that had been uttered, blocking out all extraneous noise and ushering in a silence so profound that you could hear almost every heartbeat. The whole world seemed to revolve now around someone who was kneeling down with a ring and offering it to someone else who was standing up.

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YES!

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The scene in itself was not new; it was a scene that is usually played out the world over on occasions such as this. But it was different, yes somewhat different. Music was playing in the background – a very romantic song by Celine Dion. Oh, someone said YES?

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YES, I WILL MARRY YOU!

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That was the reply to the question – the sweet words that had been uttered. The room burst into applause. The atoms in the room seemed to revel in this moment, vibrating till they reached a crescendo. Wale stretched out his hand, and Funmi, still kneeling, placed the 5 carat-diamond engagement ring in his finger. Wale helped her to her feet. She whispered into his ear and as if on cue, he reached into his pocket and produced a 10-carat diamond engagement ring and placed it on her finger. And then they kissed it was a very deep warm loving ‘get-a-room’-kind of kiss. If you want to know what she whispered into his ear, it was ‘my ring is in your right pocket…you can get it out now and put it on my finger.’

Tayo was the happiest person in the room. She was screaming in ecstatic joy as Wale and Funmi smooched. Lola was ‘shocked-happy’ – shocked because Funmi just got on her knees and proposed to Wale instead of the other way around, but happy because he said YES, and gave her a ring (also). Akin seemed to be indifferent – he was mainly looking at Tayo – she was looking very sexy tonight, he thought. But you could tell that Dupe wasn’t very happy – she looked away - she could not even bring herself to watch Wale and Funmi kiss. The kissing continued for what seemed to be an eternity. Wale whispered into Funmi’s ear..

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Wale: Funmi, can I talk to you alone for a moment?

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Funmi: OK, dear.

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Wale and Funmi walked into the next room (the bar area) of the restaurant/bar. Their guests – Tayo, Lola, Dupe, Akin were in the main restaurant area. Oh, I didn’t tell you why they were all here. It was Wale’s birthday and all had been invited – and there (as described above) Funmi popped the question.

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Wale: You really surprised me in there. You didn’t give me any heads up….

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Funmi: I decided that if you were not going to propose to me, then I would propose to you. I read somewhere that love speaks from the heart. I want to be with you forever and so I laid my heart bare before you.. Oh (smiles) as to the rings – I bought both of them (to match) and put the one you gave me in your pocket when you were not looking….Oh, by the way – I am moving in this weekend! Oh, I have started planning our wedding too….

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Wale: You are moving in this weekend? You have started planning our wedding? Funmi, all this is happening too fast. I need some space and I definitely need to know things before you do them – not after. For example, I was embarrassed when you proposed to me just now, but I didn’t want to embarrass you and so I said YES. You are a Yoruba girl, you brought yourself very low in proposing to me…you should be ashamed -- Yoruba girls should not do that – it reveals desperation. I would have said NO, but because I love you and I want to marry you someday, I said YES.

I am embarrassed also that you are moving in and planning our wedding – all behind my back. You are encroaching on my private space and you are taking decisions without discussing them with me..this is not how it should be done.

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Funmi: (getting upset and emotional) then please tell me how it should be done. We have been dating (courting) for 5 years. I let you take charge. I give you everything. All I want is to be your wife..and that is so hard for you? In the beginning, you told me you wanted to make more money…now you have made some money. You told me you wanted to lock in a promotion in the company…now you have your promotion. And in all this while, I have been waiting for you…waiting for you..waiting for you! You are so selfish and so cruel…. It’s all about what you want…what about what I want. I want to be married….(she starts sobbing).

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Wale: (embraces Funmi, speaks in whispers) Funmilade, my darling, my honey, my sweetie…I am sorry that I hurt you so. Please forgive me. I apologize. You can go ahead and start planning the wedding, but please keep me informed of every plan, I am very happy. But it is not a very good idea to move in with me - We are both born-again Christians and this wouldn’t be right in the eyes of the church – we have to be good ambassadors of our faith and this will not be appropriate. I love you my darling, and I will marry you. I am so happy that we are now engaged. This is the best birthday present that I have ever had.

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Funmi: (screams with joy) really! I am so happy…

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Wale smiles and dances with her to some romantic music that was playing in the bar area. She pushed her body into his and closed her eyes. As he looked at her he realized that she was shivering with joy.

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Tayo had noticed Akin watching her all evening. It had been almost a year since they broke up. Just watching Funmi propose to Wale made her feel like speaking with Akin, and she didn’t know why. It wouldn’t be worth it – speaking with him. What would they talk about? But she missed talking with him though. When they were a couple, they would talk about anything and everything – he was always very open and very kind with his words. He had so much wisdom – he knew things that you wouldn’t even know that he knew – it was as if he knew a little about everything that there is to know. You could talk with him for hours and not even know it. In the past, she remembered now, he was the one she always looked up to, the one she always wanted to talk with. That past is gone, withered away in the decay of her rage. She remembered that day – a day of joy and anger and sorrow. It had started with joy, and then it became anger, and then sorrow.

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1 year ago

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Tayo: Akin, guess what?!

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Akin: What?

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Tayo: I haven’t seen my period – it means that we are pregnant (smiling).

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Akin: (quiet for a while, and then…) OK!

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Tayo: You just said OK. You should hug me, tell me you love me, tell me it will all be alright. Tell me you are extremely happy to hear this good news.

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Akin: It will be alright!

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Tayo: Akin dear, do not be afraid. I am not making any major demands on you. We are already a couple and I will not force you to propose marriage – love trumps marriage anytime anyday. I will not change anything that we have. The baby will just bring us more joy than we already share.

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Akin: Is the baby mine?

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Tayo: Haaa. Akin how can you ask me such a question as if you are in doubt. Of course, the baby is yours.

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Akin: Your friend Dupe told me otherwise.

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Tayo: Dupe? What did she tell you?

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Akin: She told me that you and Chief Ajao have been having a sexual affair. She told me that he is your sugardaddy. Isn’t this true?

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Tayo: Noooo. Chief Ajao is my boss at the office. There is no affair going on. Don’t believe her, she is lying. She is bitter and she wants to destroy everyone who is not as bitter as she is. She envies the love we have for each other – you and I. Remind me to slap that Dupe of a girl – she is just trying to break us up and you mustn’t let her. And I am shocked, this is so unlike you – we share everything together – we do not hide any information from each other – but you have been keeping this ‘wrong information’ in your heart and you didn’t tell me until the day I tell you that I am pregnant for you.

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Akin: OK…well, I don’t want the baby.

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Tayo: What? You are talking about our baby as if it is thrash!

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Akin: If it is not thrash, what is it? Of course, it is thrash. Do you know how many children I have aborted? I cannot even count. It is not a big deal – we will remove this one because I am not having it.

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Tayo: What has come over you? This is not you talking. What has Dupe been feeding you? Or are you f**ing her?

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At this, Akin moved very fast and before Tayo could react, he landed a very hot slap on her cheek – her right cheek. The slap was so violent, she fell on the floor and almost passed out. His palms were engraved on her face, an imprint that was as painful as it was shocking. The shock made her numb and she could not even move. She just laid there trying to wake up from this violent dream. But it was not a dream, it was reality coming home with rage in its breath. The rage moved from without to within her through the air that she breathed into her lungs. The air was angry, and so was she. She turned slowly and looked at Akin. There was a look of disgust on his face and right there and then she knew that this was not the man that she wanted to have a child with. This man was not a good man anymore and could never be, at least not in her eyes. She wouldn’t forget this day forever and would not be able to pretend that it didn’t happen. She knew also that she could not be with him any longer, the rage she felt against him could not be assuaged even by the ultimate sacrifice. She broke up with him right there and then.

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Back at the birthday/ engagement party, Akin walked up to Tayo.

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Akin: Tayo, how are you?

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Tayo: Not bad! You?

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Akin: Not bad except I could use a little company….(pauses, she didn’t reply and there was this awkward silence). You must be very happy – Funmi finally gets engaged after a very long time.

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Tayo: Yes, I am very happy. Can you please excuse me – I got something to do?

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With that she walked away with Akin staring at her rear – her curves as they strained through her tight mini-skirt as she walked away. The curves were a reminder to him of what he had, what he lost and what he could never have again. He turned away and walked up to Lola.

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Akin: Lolly, how are you babe?

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Lola: I am fine

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Akin: Your husband almost found out that Abeke wasn’t his own yesterday, you know? I falsified the genotype results and told him that he was AS and that you were AC….the reason why Abeke is SC. But I think he is still suspicious. He may try to do a genotype somewhere else and he will find out that he is AA. You do not have to worry about your own genotype it is AC as indicated…(pauses). But when Yomi finds out that the baby is not his own (and he’s going to find out someday), all hell’s going to break lose. I suggest you let him know.

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Lola: Let him know? No…if I tell him – he will kill me. I don’t even know what to do.

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Akin: If I may ask – Who is the father of the baby?

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Lola: The father of the baby? (pauses) Can I trust you?

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Akin: Yes, you can trust me. I have had to bail you out many times. You have a sure confidant in me.

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Lola: The father of the baby is Wale.
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(EPISODE 4 JUST BELOW)

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3 years ago

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Lola was dressed to kill. She had on very tight body-hugging top and even tighter mini-skirt. Oh, my bad, I forgot to tell you that Lola was a very sexy girl (she is similar in shape to the attached picture). This was because she had wicked curves, curves that can make the world go round four times – once around her chest, twice around her gluteal regions, and one more time around those hips. She was the type of lady that men describe as ‘not very good-looking but dangerously sexy’…but she copiously compensated for her lack of facial beauty with a body that can make men shiver. And now imagine – she was wearing very tight clothes. Anyway, back to the story before I get carried away myself. She had knocked on the door to Funmi’s apartment. It took a while before anyone answered, and when someone did – it wasn’t Funmi. It was Wale, Funmi’s boyfriend, and he was wearing only boxers.

Lola: Hey Wale, is Funmi in?

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Wale (whistles, staring speechlessly at her as if he had just seen a mermaid – for those of you that have seen mermaids before, you understand this): Ummmmmm

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Lola: Hello…..eyes up here! (She said this because she caught his eyes drifting first to her bosom, and then to her hips, and she knew he was straining to get a view of her rear).

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Wale: She is not in. Omolola, please come in and wait for her, she won’t be long.

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Now remember this – this is not the first time that Wale had met Lola. They had been acquainted already for 2 years. BUT this was the first time that he had seen her like this. Normally she wore dresses, but today, she was something else. He moved aside to let Lola into the apartment. As she passed by him, he turned and noticed her rear as it shook in unison to the movements of her walk – the two halves of her gracious rear moved like percussion and drum in a symphony. Wale was suddenly hit hard with desire for her. She turned to face him, knowing that he would be staring at her rear and she looked down and noticed that his boxer shorts was swollen, and then it was her turn to be shocked. She whistled, and stared speechlessly at him as if she had just seen a naked angel – for those of you that have seen naked angels before you understand this. And this angel was naked, his boxers had dropped from around his waist, displaced by the turgor of what it hid – and now his secrets were opened to the air, and to her eyes. Her legs started to shake, and she needed to sit down. So this is what Funmi is enjoying, she thought to herself. She remembered that Funmi always boasted and braged to all the girls – Dupe, Tayo, and herself – that Wale was ‘something else under there’, but she thought she was just exaggerating. NOW, she realized that Funmi wasn’t exaggerating – this guy was like 3 men or more. All this time, Wale was watching her and he approached very quickly – one second, he was by the door and the next second he was right in front of her – and his boxers were still on the floor by the door. He reached out and held her waist, very roughly. She felt as if she was in the vortex of a whirlwind, in the eye of a storm, and in the raging waves of the tempest.

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Lola (shivering): Wale, I have a fiancé.

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Wale: Your fiancé is NOT here in this room.

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Lola: You have a girlfriend – who is also my bestfriend.

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Wale: My girlfriend is NOT here in this room.

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Lola: We can’t do this – it would not be right.

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Wale: THIS…(he held her hand to his tumescent member)…is not about right or wrong. THIS is about biology, chemistry, physics and geography. THIS is Biology because I reacted to you and chemistry because you reacted to me. THIS is Physics because we can feel the HEAT and the FORCES all around us right now. THIS is Geography because your body is like a beautiful landscape waiting to be explored by me. THIS is not about right and wrong. THIS is destiny – you came in here to see Funmi, but now you have met me and what I can offer you.

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Wale led her to the bedroom – Funmi’s bedroom – like fresh meat about to be butchered. And yes, he butchered her for hours – he butchered her insides. He gave her bliss, pleasure beyond imagination – during the intense encounter, she screamed for help – she screamed for her friend – she screamed for Funmi.

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That was 3 years ago. Lola collected her thoughts and snapped back to reality. But she was excited even by the memories and her legs began to shake. She reached for her husband Yomi and kissed him lightly on the cheek. They were at home. He responded to her touch. She excused herself and went into the bedroom. After a little while, she came out wearing the exact body hugging top and the tight mini-skirt which she had worn 3 years ago (see above). Yomi was excited. He carried her into the bedroom. Yomi made love to his wife. Lola reminded herself continuously not to scream out Wale’s name.

(fade)

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The motel room was alive. Ecstatic sounds and pleasure-tortured moans filled the room from the bottom to the top. Only the creaks of the bed would have belied what sort of activity this was. And then the sex was over. The man had finished too quickly. The woman had been on top and now she disembarked very slowly, rolled on her back and stared at the ceiling as if looking for something more important in the ceiling boards. She didn’t say a word. The man knew why she wasn’t talking – it was because the sex wasn’t good today and she hadn’t been satisfied. Suddenly the man felt self-conscious and inadequate. He searched his head for the right words to say.

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Chigozie: Tayo, I am very sorry that it was not very good today – I am tired from work. Please do not be upset with me.

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Tayo: Wow, 3 minutes? Is this the best you can do? You need to start exercising more – you and that your stupid fat wife. How is Dupe by the way?

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Chigozie: Which kind of silly question is that? We do not have any intimacy at all. I can not even respond when she’s around – I am impotent around her. If not of a friend like you taking care of my needs, I would have committed suicide a long time ago. You have saved my life. You are an outlet for me to release all the emotional tension I feel at home. You are a place of soccour and solace. And you are a container of pleasure. You make me feel like a rabbit – a big rabbit.

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Tayo: You mean you have not been having sex with your wife? Ha..which type of man are you? You have to meet up with your responsibilities. (pause) No wonder she is so frustrated and no wonder she is getting fatter too. Don’t you know that sex helps to burn calories and helps to keep you fit and in shape? If you want Dupe to lose weight, you know what to do. (laughs) but seeing how so fat she is you have your work cut out for you (laughs hard).

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Chigozie: (laughs hard too) Ah T-a-y-o!!! Well at least I can thank you for helping me to keep in shape for the past one year. If not of you, maybe I will be as fat as that elephant that I call my wife.

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Tayo: But seriously you have to touch her from time to time. You can close your eyes when you are making love to your wife and think of me – that way you will be able to survive the ordeal…Are you ready for another round? You better give me a good 30 minutes straight this time.

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Chigozie: Yes dear, I will give you your 30 minutes. Let me take my medicine. I will tear you into pieces and show you who your Igwe is.

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Tayo: (feigning fear) Please Igwe, be gentle with me. I am a virgin! (laughs very loud).

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(fade)

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Akin: Funmi how are you?

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Funmi: I am fine o – I am so happy. I called you here to thank you for your advice about proposing to Wale. It worked. I was very afraid and very hesitant. I asked the ladies and no one suggested that, but you know it is important to understand how a man’s mind works – it is different from a lady’s mind. Thank you for being there, thank you for great advice. I am eternally grateful to you – because of you I am engaged and will soon be Mrs Funmilade Ajao. (laughs with joy).

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Akin: You know me – anything to help a friend. So, how does it feel being engaged?

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Funmi: You cannot imagine how it feels. It feels so so so good. I am so excited I can fly.

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Akin: There is something I want to tell you…..

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But just then the phone rang and it was Wale. Funmi excused herself and walked some distance away to engage in some intimate talk. Akin watched her walk away and shook his head. She noticed that he did this and filed it away in her mind to ask him later why he did. The phone call lasted for about 20 minutes and she came back to the table.

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Funmi: sorry, it was my sweetheart who called. So you wanted to tell me something?...

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Just then the phone rang again – it was Dupe.

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(fade)

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Chigozie felt happy and bad. Happy because he had just had sex. Bad because that is how he always felt after he cheated on his wife – which was at least twice every single week (for about a year now). He felt bad because he wasn’t just cheating on her with anybody, but he was doing this with her friend Tayo. He remembered that it was Tayo who approached him sometime back in church. See, he was a deacon in the church and Tayo had come to meet him that she had a spiritual problem and she needed some counseling from him. He had agreed to meet her at her place. She then proceeded to tell him that she ‘liked’ sex a lot, and went on to describe in detail some of the things she had done. The confession became a seduction – he was aroused by her every word. And that was when it all started. The pleasure, he remembered even now, was unbelievable – Tayo was like a wild animal. He did enjoy sex with her, but he knew it had to stop. He loved his wife and he must make things right. His wife – Modupe! He felt so bad that he had hurt her very deeply with his words a few days ago – he had called her fat and boring. This was wrong! He had to apologize and make amends. He prayed for courage to be able to STOP his trysts with Tayo. Suddenly he missed his wife so much and decided he had to call her. He picked up his phone and dialed her number. The phone rang and rang, but no one picked up.

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Yomi was shocked. His doctor (not Akin) just told him that he was AA and that there was no way he could be the father of a child that was SC (the doctor had also checked Abeke, Yomi brought Abeke secretly to his doctor – he didn’t want Lola to know).

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Yomi: Oh my GOD, Abeke is not my daughter. Lola is a bloody liar.

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Doctor Ajibola: She is definitely not yours. No chance at all. BUT please be calm, you are shaking in rage, please do not do anything drastic.

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Yomi: You are asking me to be calm? How can I be calm? When I am married to a harlot! A whore. A prostitute.

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Doctor: I suggest you have a discussion with your wife and resolve this issue.

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Yomi walked out of the doctor's room angrily. He passed the room where his 'daughter' Abeke was…and he just kept walking. He didn’t stop to pick his 'daughter' up - he just left her there. A nurse saw his face and could only describe it as a ‘mask’ – she knew that this man was about to do something dangerous.

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(fade)

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Dupe was not crying anymore. She had been crying almost everyday for the past few days. But now she was smiling. She was sitting on a chair, thinking. Her phone rang and she saw that it was her husband Chigozie. She wanted to pick up the phone, but she wanted him to suffer a little for how he made her cry. And so she didn’t pick up the phone. Let it ring and ring and let him get worried, she thought. She looked at her wedding band, she would keep it on - some people take it off on a day like this. She thought about the engagement of her friend Funmi. She thought it was humiliating to see her dear friend kneeling for a man and begging to be his wife (it was supposed to be the other way round) – she was not amused or impressed. In fact, she was livid and angry. How could she do that even after all the advice she gave her. She needed to talk to her.

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Funmi: Yes Modupe.

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Dupe: Funmilade, how are you?

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Funmi: I am fine. I am actually with Akin at the moment.

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Dupe: Why did you propose to Wale? I adviced you to give him an ultimatum and let him propose but instead you buried your pride and begged him like a desperate woman to be his wife….

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Funmi: I don’t understand you o. You are supposed to be my friend. You are supposed to be happy for me. Why can’t you be happy for me. You are happily married to Chigozie and I am happy for you guys. You know I have always wanted this for a long time, and when my day finally comes, you are angry. I saw you at Wale’s birthday, you were frowning your face when I expected you to be smiling. Only Tayo was happy. …And you call yourself my friend (sobbing silently).

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Dupe: I am sorry that I was not happy to see you make a mistake. I am sorry that I was not happy to see you act desperate in front of everybody. I am sorry that you acted so naïve. But I am not sorry about what I feel about this whole thing. See, listen to me Funmilade, I am your friend, I care about you a lot. I do not trust that Wale is for you. I think he may be unfaithful.

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Funmi: OH SHUT UP!

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With this Funmi dropped the call. Dupe was so shocked – she couldn’t believe that Funmi just hung up on her like that. Their friendship was being tested with this engagement thing, she thought. Well, she will talk with Funmi again. She got off from the chair and undressed to her underwear. The man walked out of the bathroom in just his boxers – he had just taken a shower.

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Wale: Dupe, I overhead you talking with my fiancée, I hope all is well. NOW, lets have a good time. Before I went into the bathroom I ordered you to take off everything. Let us get to work.

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Please click for LIFE'S CHOICE 5

HELP 5 (CAN'T SEXUALLY RESPOND TO MY HUSBAND)

By my thinking any one of us can be silently going through terrible ordeals in our lives thinking we are alone, and believing there is no solution, no way out, well there is a way out! All you need to do is speak out or write anonymously, someone somewhere will respond to you. You are never alone, certainly not in blogsville. So I was browsing blogsville when I came across some stories. They claim to be true life stories and the writers actually need our advice. I couldnt resist but bring some of them to them to my blog so readers who have gone though a similar experience can play agony aunt and give them solutions. Or you can even give them some tough love as well. They will be published from time to time in a series titled 'HELP', this is the fourth part. You can find Help 1 Help 2 Help 3 just by a cick. Help 4 This is from a middle aged woman........................................................................................................................................................................................... “My husband and I have always had healthy sexual appetite since we got married about 30 years ago. We are now in our fifties. He is older than me by about 4 years. In fact at our early ages, we used to f*ck virtually every day. ........................................................................................................................................................................................... Any one of use could initiate sexual moves. We used various styles imaginable to spice our sex lives. We did it every where – kitchen o, sitting room o, bathroom o. No where was a taboo! We even used to f*ck in our car when on outings (it used to be all nite parties in Nigeria in the old days). But gradually as we grow older, our sex life tapered off to about 2ce a week. ........................................................................................................................................................................................... I still love my hubby very much. In fact I don’t think I can do without his company at anytime. And I know he loves me very much. My problem now is, while my husband’s sexual appetite is still relatively healthy(he still wants it once or twice a week), my own has reduced drastically. ........................................................................................................................................................................................... Actually I have little or no interest in sex again. Only my hubby now initiates sex and I only participate in a perfunctionary ways. If he doesn’t initiate sex in a month, it is like I am happy that he let me be! ........................................................................................................................................................................................... My husband now complains every time. In fact, any small gesture on his part that can lead to sex, I tend to discourage reflexively. Gestures like romancing me anywhere in the house (The kids are all gone) or kissing me, playing with my breasts etc, are the things I only allow when we are actually fucking so that he can enjoy the sex a little bit. I hardly participate. ........................................................................................................................................................................................... I know if we are in Nigeria (We now live in a Manchester suburbs), he would have gone out to play the field. What can I do? How do I rekindle my interest? He has tried several things. Blue film ni o, bought me some lingerie to wear, or tries several sex moves that can rekindle the spark. Nothing seems to work. ........................................................................................................................................................................................... Please help! What can I do?”