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Wednesday, 2 February 2011

.....and on a lighter note: Are you an AJEBOTA or AJEPAKO .... :P

Just noticed I had to many serious mental meanderings lately, so decided to go lighter route. This is similar to my telesales joke. Enjoy

1. If every morning after you wake up, your folks give you a hug and a kiss before sending you off to school, then you might be an AJEBOTA. But if them toss you beta slap for not kneeling down or prostrating "properly", you are definitely PAKO! Like my guy wey im papa ask am one day; NA GREET YOU DEY GREET ME ABI YOU DEY TRY CATSH SHICKEN?
Is the picture, offensive or hilarious? depends on your perspective baby! xxx

2. If as a young lady, before you even dare stepping outside you put on at least a pair of jeans and a T-shirt with a face cap on with matching sneakers, you could pass for an AJEBOTA. But if you repeatedly nonchalantly tie only wrapper round your chest, u throway leg inside foam slippers and waka go Mama Bomboy kiosk to buy maggi seasoning cube, your PAKONESS don attain xtra height.

3. If your folks, perhaps through an exclusive Country Club, introduced you to a variety of sports like cricket, golf or polo, we would agree that you're an AJEBOTA. But if motor don avoid jamming u repeatedly from either playing "ten-ten", "su-way" or "set (5 per side soccer)", no long thing when I just say u be HEAVY PAKO.

4. If your clothes were bought exclusively from abroad and you were wearing the latest and most popular name brands that made everybody else wonder, I will classify you as an AJEBOTA. But whereby you specialize for "Boskona" (trying your clothes in a makeshift stall before you purchase) pricing, you are HEAVILY ENPAKOIATED.

5. If you were the type to get dropped in school and picked up by a driver designated to do so by your parents, I'll qualify you as an AJEBOTA. But if you hold world record of flying "DANFO" and "MOLUE a.k.a. FUNKY TRAIN" in motion or jumping down before them even match brake and you no dey ever wound, I HAIL YOUR PAKO STANDS.

6. If you were familiar and current with the latest things in vogue, I'll rate you as an AJEBOTA. But if the 1st day you see person wear NIKE chucks and you begin wonder why im put yoruba girl name untop am, PAKOISM don skatta your head.

7. If you ever toasted a girl/guy speaking perfect Queens English with the latest "fo-ne" slangs and acting "all cool", I think you fall into the AJEBOTA category. But if your type dey approach babe/bobo with tribal mark wey no even sabi ordinary "is & was", you con mix am with your very strong and conk native dialect and you still dey try to show yourself with "ibon (bad English)" for the small grammar wey you think say you know, you are genetically PAKOlised.
Courtesy of NWG
Happy new year to those that have as wacky a sense of humour as i do ;)

8. If you either have a dry cleaner that picks up your family clothing and returns them washed, ironed and folded, or maybe you personally take them there to get the same job done, or you have a washing machine in the house and maid who finalizes the rest part, we'll fit you into the AJEBOTA clan. But then, if you dey use one full iron bucket of OMO to soak your "cloth (plural for cloth in pidgin)", den u spread untop concrete-slab for "super scrub" with Kongi soap to hustle that troublesome collar, dip in back & forth until e turn to milk colour, hand-squeeze am with your upper bodi facing 1 direction while d cloth face d opposite direction, snap and flap d cloth in mid-air like 15 times to discharge (remove) d wrinkles before u use "wooden peg" to hold am for back-yard rope or better yet, lay am over your corrugated iron fence, NNA MENNNNNNNNN, your PAKO level don nearly cross perfect 10!!!!!!!!

9. If you happen to do emergency laundry for an outfit you need to wear in a very short while, you pop it into a dryer and hit buttons to get it ready, some how, some way, you're an AJEBOTA. But if after washing, u squeeze it out, carry towel, roll am inside d towel and another person dey d other end make una for pull with force to drain d water come outside (what we refer to as "TOWEL DRYING" in KC), and den finally u use your coal iron steam-dry am, u be PAKO oooooo!!!!

10. If every summer after school your idea of a holiday is looking forward to yet another trip to Jand or Yankee, you are an in-born AJEBOTA. But if u begin jump up because say una dey go village for New Yam Festival and hunting seasons dey coincide, hence u fit finally throway your "Egungun" outfit and flex d new 1, no vex when I say u be PAKO.


kitkat said...

lol.. i'm such an ajebutter
nuh-fair!! :(

ekata said...

interesting post. I suppose it happens everywhere..I am refering to the cartoon in the lock up . Have a visit to my blog and drop by to comment. thanks :)

NakedSha said...

Oh, number 9 made me tear-up. Give me one of my secondary school days back.

Nice post.

NakedSha would be 'bĂșttako'

Mena UkodoisReady said...

@ Kitkat: It is what it is

Mena UkodoisReady said...

@KitKat: am following you right back.

@Ekata: LOL, thanks.

You didnt leave a link to your blog, please come back...!

Mena UkodoisReady said...

@ NakedSha: Hi, long time!! :))your settings are so private. Can you leave a link to your blog?

LOL@your diagnosis, but why butter first na? :P

NakedSha said...

Haha! My blog is:

henryik said...

By many of those standards,this must be Ajepako country,what with most Ajebotas wearing recycled second-hand "name" brands.
*check out some posts here:

Prism of an immigrant said...

This was so hilarious.... def made my morning :)

Mena UkodoisReady said...

@ nakedsha: gbam! I am following and am off to explore!

Mena UkodoisReady said...

@ Henry: very true oh! Even the standard ajebutter lifetsyle over there is considered very kpako almost everywhere else. LOL
will check it out, your write ups are great xxx

@ Prism: long time, this must mean you have a new blog *dancing* off to read it!

many thanks

Prism of an immigrant said...

Hahaha... no o. So you don't believe me your post made my morning? ehnehn ehn. I was laughing, sotey water fill my eyes, and it just so happened that I read it after hearing bad news.

Mena UkodoisReady said...

@ Prism: I believe you!

Bad news?:(, Am sorry to hear that. I hope all things work out for good XX

Lily Johnson said...

Hahaha. You are hilarious. Loved it.

Lily Johnson said...

Hahaha. You are hilarious. Loved it.

Anonymous said...

not the first time on your blog
but i had to comment on this
thanks for making my morning

Anonymous said...

Why now?

Ibhade {NG} said...

lollllllllll......yea! *gasping*.. shioooooo! ....from all your write up, I AM DEFINITELY AN AJEPAKO!

@the pussy cat pix...hilarious
@the handsfree pix..ingenious!
@the cartoon today?

hahahahaaa....i enjoyed this o!

Tnx for obliging me.

T.Notes said...

I declare that i am such an aje-buetter that i cannot even pronounce the darn word properly. What did you call it again?Ajea-what?!*wink*
And don't even think i'm forgiven your screwup post just yet!
Payback's an ass,i tell ya!

Mena UkodoisReady said...

@ Lily: glad you did..and yep am following you.

@Anonymous 00.56: Eitherway welcome :D

@Anonymous 04.26: why what again? just choose ya own na? looool

Mena UkodoisReady said...

@ Ibhade: you are welcome :)) Are you sure you are an ajekpakpo? I dont believe that!

@ Tnotes: Hi!The fact that you 'declare' has given us the answer! Those that protest way too much....:P

Olori said...

LOL i am a proud butterian o but my wafi side no dey let am show for my body......#imagbogbobigzgirls

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