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Tuesday, 13 July 2010

William returns: NIGERIANS, I’m going to TELL you how to fix your country, Nobody OUTSIDE of Nigeria gives a shit about your petty tribal rivalries

Hi there
Ha, I did saw I will avoid discussing politics in this blog but this piece is a rejoinder to William's first note ( ) where he detailed his experiences while working as an expatriate in Nigeria. I think he had to write this one due to the number of comments the first note gathered on facebook. Number of comments as well the general tilt of the contributors. This piece is suggesting the steps we can take to get our greatness back, goood move as I have no patience for people that criticise without solutions.

Wont spoil it with my thoughts so just keep an open mind and read on :)


Been there, done that, and It... See More’s NOT MY PROBLEM! This is just my opinion, so take it or leave it. For what it’s worth, I think those rebels down in the Delta/Rivers are people I would support. (Yeah..those guys that blow up pipelines and kidnap westerners, etc etc.)Yes, I AM angry, but have a very, very nasty habit; I can FOCUS my anger. So, now, I going to do something I very rarely do: I’m going to TELL you how to fix your country.

First, you have to stop thinking of yourselves as Ibo, or Hause, or whatever. Nobody OUTSIDE of Nigeria gives a shit about your petty tribal rivalries. You are Nigerians, and any petty rivalries can wait…or form football teams based on tribal lines; maybe you could actually learn how to play footie. And stop fighting each other, or at least compete in something that would provide some benefit.

I’ve heard that your president has banned your football team from international competition for 2 years. Is that crazy, or not? What’s HIS role model? North Korea?

You’re FLOATING on OIL, for fucks sake. Is there a single oil producing country in the world that isn’t doing pretty well for it’s people? I’m thinking OPEC/Arab countries. . The ONE large oil well left in the world got invaded by America a few years ago. (Iraq) You could be next; the USA has never worried about minor things like international law. Not that they need to: they are ALREADY pumping it out of Nigeria as fast as they can. What you going to do when it runs out? “Hey, Mr USA, we gave you all our oil, you owe us!”

Multinational reply: “Harararar….you sold it to us. What did you do with the money? Tough shit. Now go away and stop annoying us.”

Oil isn’t the only thing that Nigeria has. It’s got some amazing scenery, which people would pay to see. Pity about the lack of animals: but they could be replaced. Provided you don’t eat them.

One golden opportunity that I know of, and is being ignored; it’s a s simple as 1,2, 3.

1) There’s a nice big runway at Yola. It could easily take large jets, a few hours away from YURIP. All those weather deprived people in overcrowded countries.
2) Of course, planeloads of tourists aren’t going to visit Yola to stay in a very uncomfortable hotel, no matter how grand the scenery. So that’s got to be fixed.
3) A couple of hours drive, depending on season and the state of the road, there’s a HUGE dam to the North West. Huge body of fresh water. Boats, Yachts, windsurfing, scuba diving, water skiing…….do I need to draw a picture?

Of course, the biggest problem would be overcoming the Nigerian desire for instant wealth. “Hey…if I skim off this contract, I can build a new mansion in France!”

Just for fun, just how much work would a project like this generate? IF you don’t contract everything out, and that includes food production; Adamawa is pretty fertile state, with some big rivers… as much food as possible would be grown in the area, instead of just importing everything. So there’s a lot of employment, straight away. Then refurbishment of the hotel, plus some road repairs…permanent hotel staff, drivers, tourist guides…the DIRECT employment would be in the hundreds. Indirect would be in thousands.

Hotel refurbishment

Gut it, and replace whatever needs replacing. Plumbing, electrical, air con etc. This COULD be a showpiece, simply because all the replacement equipment could be of the type that is Nigeria-friendly type. That is, maintenance free, because Nigerians are not good at looking after things. So as well as energy efficient lighting and appliances, which make sense in an electricity-scarce area, things like LED lighting last hundreds of times longer than conventional lighting.

Rant mode *OFF*.


Agreed or Disagreed?



The picture above represents the author and he can be reached through this blog as well as on myspace :


Anonymous said...

this guy is the best. Nigerians are so stupid that we think that the world gives a shit about our ethnic diversity. the truth we forget to realise is that we are Nigerians first before our ethnic groups because if we go out there nobody's going to care if you are Ibo or Yoruba or what not. when Abdulmutallab tried his bullshit; did they say " a Hausa boy just attempted bombing America"? they said A NIGERIAN. the sooner we get that into our thick skulls the better.

he was also right in the other things he wrote. it is harsh but straight to the point the only thing i kinda have a problem with is the NIGER DELTA THING. i live in PORT HARCOURT and when those militants did their nonsense, it wasn't funny. as in we were searched every bloody time. it was terrible and the way people way. i so did not find that funny. if they want to enforce a change, there are other ways to go about it. killing the very people you claim to be fighting for is so not one of them.

Anonymous said...

mena please can i repost this on my blog, it is too cool not to repost, please........?

Mena UkodoisReady said...

Thanks for the comment Skank, I expected nothing less..

Please abeg repost and repost again..I even put the link to his first note, feel free to repots that as well..


Anonymous said...

so true! really hurts to see wasteful spendings ....ha! what a pity!

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C.A said...

If stinking lord luggard had remained in his shitty britain rather than causing problems in West Africa by forcing rival ethnic groups to share a country, we will not need a white piece of trash/scumbag like william to tell us how to fix Nigeria. Even if william makes some valid points, just looking at his picture alone reminds me of those white trailer trashes that are hooked on hard drugs in the western world. The title of his article alone will not even permit me to take his retarded, attention seeking, unnecessarily-obsessed-with-Nigeria, pink ass seriously. Truth be told Mena, I am so tired of europeans and their descendants acting like they are some mini gods and Africans and their descendants must worship them. Newsflash, as long as they (caucasians) succumb to sickness and/or death like all other groups of humans, they ain't shit in my book.

First of all, kindly allow me to categorically state that I cannot take any advise from a group of people who committed all sorts of atrocities around the world, from slavery to colonialism meant to enrich themselves and their nations, to passing diseases to native americans in the U.S, to what have you. In addition, because the average caucasian is a muthafucking rascist, I find it very difficult to respect their opinions when it centers around Africans and their descendants. It is like listening to a chuvinist/mysogynist give you a woman advise on relationships. You know very well that his biased mind will not allow him give a balanced opinion since his underlying resentful mind will prohibit such. The same can be said of europeans and their descendants. These set of people have never really liked Africans as history has shown. Generally speaking, they have never meant well for us anyway so they are the last people that I will think of taking any advise from. I do not trust them Mena and if I alone consisted of Nigeria or Africa, they would have never been allowed to step their toe into my territory. Again, if punk ass lugard had chosen to keep his pink ass in britain, Nigerians will not be in half the mess we are in today and then maybe, we would not need trashbag, mentally retarded, drug addicted william to tell us how to fix our country.

Mena, kindly tell the pig to stop obsessing about Nigeria because honestly nobody INSIDE (and even outside) Nigeria gives a shit about what his mentally deranged brain thinks about us! I really don't blame him. I blame the Nigerian who approved him to get a visa to come and work/live in Nigeria. My 2 cents.

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