Wednesday, 8 June 2011
I MISS MY GRANDMA
She bathed us, loved us with all she had, looked after us. She always wanted the most simple of things and was very good at keeping gifts in prestine shape.She gave us a good deal of....a n y t h i n g.Nothing was too much for her to do. She brought us up and served a s a good source of our family history. yes she helped her only daughter,from the beginning till the end, i dont know how she(daughter) can survive this..
She was a calming influence, an assurance that every thing would be alright. She never complained,always having a laugh,joke,or story from the past. Even when she got upset,her voice was so gentle, it soothed you rather than grates you.
I remember when a sibling came home on holidays, she wanted to see if his nether regions..you see this sibling,as an infant, had accidentally slipped into a pot of hot water,his skin was badly burned, so she wanted to check if that area turned out alright...Yes, a very authentic source of family history.lol
I can remember when her husband died, i took a hanky and was cleaning her sweat,i dont KNOW why i remember that moment.. i could feel truly free with her. My heart bleeds
Towards the end,she became the child and i was the adult,taking care of her, gently assuring her about Gods Promises. After her first stroke, i remember always telling her in a gentle way that certain foods should be avoided..she never agreed with me.does it matter now?
Oh Gosh do i miss her..i miss her so much,it hurts me. I cant believe..i am gutted. For the first time, i look at the word "gutted" my guts do feel pulled out..
I cant believe that i will never see my grandma again..so many things i feel i should have done better, so many things i would still like to do with her. Couldnt she have waited a bit...?am i being selfish, unreasonable?questioning God? I dont know yet cause i am still in shock..Looking at the aged women i come across on the street, brings back memories.
I love you grandma, till we meet again..i REFUSE to say g o o d b y e,not yet,not now...
Rest in perfect peace in the bosom of the Lord. (did i just write that?)
by Mena on on Sunday, April 20, 2008 at 12:06pm