LIFE'S CHOICE (2)

HiPlease Click here for first part. Here is the second part of Love Under Water by Femi Job..Enjoy xxx


Before I proceed, I will introduce you to all the characters in this little drama. You have met Funmi, Dupe, Lola, Tayo and Wale. You are yet to personally meet Yomi (Lola’s husband), Akin (Tayo’s ex-fiance), Chigozie (Dupe’s husband) and Chief Ajao. There are other characters, but the aforementioned names are the characters of consequence in this story. I will advice that you pause at this juncture, take a piece of paper (or a notebook) and write these names down so that as the story goes on and gets a little bit more complicated (and it will I assure you) you will have a compass to bring everything into perspective. Now, let us get back to the story….

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Tayo: Wale, Funmi is upset that you haven’t proposed to her. I adviced her to step it up to the next level and move in with you. You know that can’t happen because you have to make out time for me always. You can give her an engagement ring to console her -- I can get you a ring to give her. (see episode 1)

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Wale: She is getting very desperate oh. I think maybe it is time to dump her….or what do you think?

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Tayo: NOOOO, you will not dump my friend o, or else I will deal with you…(laughs)

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Wale: But it is you that I want to be with. (smiles) It is you I want to wake up with, it is you I want to make love to. You know – you are way better than Funmi in bed. She just lies there like a log of wood and makes funny noises, but you…..you are the consummate professional – you know the right moves to make, the right moans and groans to express. You are a container of pleasure. Funmi is like an old cargo….very plain, very boring in bed. I am already tired. You know when I have sex with Funmi I close my eyes and think of you – that is the only way I enjoy it. Funmi is an empty shell.

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Tayo: (smiles) oooh that is so sweet….I am suddenly horny again. Come here…..

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Tayo and Wale started making love again. In the middle of it, the phone rang – Tayo’s phone. They continued the lovemaking while Tayo answered the phone.

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Funmi: Tayo

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Tayo: Fffffffunmmmmiiiii……haaaa…ummmmm…oooooooosh.

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Funmi: Tayo why are you stammering, did I catch you at a bad time?

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Tayo: No, you can talk…please talk…I ate some jalapeno pepper and it’s affecting my speech.

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Funmi: About what you said earlier. I have decided to do what you proposed – I will move in with Wale.

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Tayo: Good, I am so happy that you made the right chooooooooooiceeeeeeeee…aaaaah.....you should call him and let him know as soon as possible…ok, I got to go now…the jalapeno pepper is very spicy it is burning up my insides.

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The call ended.

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Tayo: Wale, you are so gooood….Funmi will call youuuuuu…aaaah……now, and she will propose to move in. You are to tell her that you’ll think about it OK?

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The phone rang. It was Wale’s phone.

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Wale: Funmi darling, my sweetie, my lover, my friend, my companion, Ololufe mi, the one who makes my heart beat faster - the one and only lady in the world who can make me happy. …..How are you?

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Funmi: Wale, sweetie pie, I am fine. I wanted to call you to discuss something, is this a good time?

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Wale: This is not a good time. I am in the middle of a business meeting. I will call you back in about an hour. LOVE you!

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Funmi: Love you too.

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Wale hung up the phone just as he, and Tayo, together, reached the top of the mountain’ and they both went into a freefall through realms of pleasure until they crashed back down to earth.

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(fade)

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Chigozie and Dupe are laying in bed. Dupe is wearing a sexy lingerie, but Chigozie seems not to notice. Dupe brushes up against him with her legs – still he didn’t notice. Dupe proceeds to use her hands to ‘change his down-there gear to higher gear’ (don’t ask me what this means, I won’t tell!). At her touch, Chigozie responds by moving away.

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Dupe: Chigozie, let’s make love!

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Chigozie: not tonight my dear, I am tired, I have been working all day at the office.

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Dupe: This is what you say every night – that you are tired. We have not had sex in over a year now. We are married, what is it that is the problem?

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Chigozie: Go to sleep Dupe, there is more to marriage than just sex.

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Dupe: I am not sexually fulfilled. I am not satisfied with your ‘work’ in the bedroom. The last time we did it (and this is eternity ago), I wasn’t satisfied. In fact, I don’t remember being ever really satisfied with you. YOU NEED TO STEP UP.

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Chigozie: (raising his voice)… I NEED TO STEP UP OR WHAT!!!! WHAT are you going to do?

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Dupe was about to say something, but she thought about it and chose not to say it. Chigozie was looking at her. He shook his head slowly.

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Chigozie: Maybe if you were not as fat as an elephant I would enjoy making love to you too…OH yes, I said it – you just complained that you are not satisfied in bed, well, guess what – I am not satisfied too. If not of the fact that I was married to you, I won’t even sleep in the same bed with you. You married and then you ‘let yourself go’ and now you are so fat it is disgusting. If I had known that this is how you will look after 2 years of marriage, I would not have allowed you to force me to marry you – YES, we both know that you ‘forced’ me to propose to you (and marry you) with an ultimatum. Sometimes I really wish you hadn’t done that. What ‘desperate’ ladies like you do not understand is that you should allow a man to reach a decision on his own, do not cajole, coerce or compel him to marry you. Things were better between us before we married. Sometimes I wish I could go back to those days. (pauses) In fact, I am going to sleep in the parlor tonight.

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Chigozie took his pillows and blankets and almost ran out of the room. Dupe wanted to tell him to wait but she was too shocked and angry to say anything. He had said very hurtful things and she wanted to hate him so much. She was living a lie, pretending to everyone that they were happily married. When he left, she started crying deep inside. The tears bubbled up from her heart and perfused her whole being, escaping out of her eyes because there was nowhere else for the tears to go. The tears fell like sudden rain, overwhelming her mind and taking all her emotions captive.

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Tayo performed the pregnancy test - twice. Both came out positive. This means she was pregnant, but for who? She ran a list of all the men that she was intimate with trying to hone in on the person most likely to be the 'owner' of the pregnancy. Well, maybe Wale, maybe someone else. She went to the bar area (next to her kitchen) and fixed herself a very hard drink. One was not supposed to drink while pregnant, but who cares, she thought - she wasn't going to keep it anyway. Her phone rang - it was Lola.

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Tayo: Omolola, how are you?

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Lola: Hey Tayo, how are you?

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Tayo: Fine....so, what's up?

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Lola: Is Wale there with you?

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Tayo (pauses): Nooooo, and why are you asking about him?

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Lola: Nothing, I just need to speak with him. Do you have his phone number - I have the old one but I think he changed his number.

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Tayo: I have his new number, but you know my policy - I don't give numbers out. So, what do you want to speak with him about....about what?

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Lola: Don't worry about that....well....

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Tayo: If you really need to speak with him, you should call Funmi. I think he's at her place at the moment.

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Lola: No worries!

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Tayo: What you want to say to him must not be very important or else I just told you who to call to reach him and you are hesitating? Or you don't want Funmi to know what you want to speak with Wale about? If you must reach him in a hurry, you can ask Akin for his number.

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Wale and Funmi were still locked in a very tight embrace. They had just finished making love. They were at Wale's place. Wale smiled and spoke in very low tones, telling Funmi how beautiful the sex was. But she knew that it wasn't very beautiful today, for one - he was very quick. Funmi knew that Wale was the best lover in the whole world. In fact, when they started dating, it didn't take very long for them to start having sex. And when they started having sex, Funmi's life changed forever -- it was like she was born-again. She could not believe the unbelievable pleasure she felt when she 'came' - oh, and it was with Wale that she first began to enjoy sex. Before Wale, she thought sex was just something people did and pretended to really like. But Wale forced a re-definition of what sex really was - paradise unbridled, an unfolding of inner and outer bliss. This was one, amongst many other reasons, that she was not willing to leave him. Wale was her crown, and she knew that no other man could make her feel the way he did - in bed.

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Wale: What did you want to talk to me about earlier?

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Funmi: I wanted to know when you planned to propose to me.

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Wale: That will be soon....don't worry I will propose to you.

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Funmi: Wale, it's been 5 long years, don't you think that it's too long?

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Wale: They say 7 is the perfect number....just kidding...yes, it's a long time but we love each other and that is what counts.

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Funmi; But if you love me, you would have married me by now, wouldn't you have?

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Wale: Love and marriage are two different things...but yes, you have a point....like I said before, don't worry, I will marry you.

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Funmi: WHEN!

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Wale: Soon!

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Funmi: Soon when!

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Wale: Please can we change this topic?

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Funmi: Why do you always want to change the topic when we are discussing OUR future. Anyway, I just wanted you to know that I have not seen my period and I may be pregnant. So, the 'soon' has to be VERY SOON.

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Lola and Yomi were at the hospital. They were sitting in front of the doctor – doctor Akin (Tayo’s ex-fiance). Their daughter Abeke was sick. She was just 2 years+ old.

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Doctor Akin: We need to do a blood transfusion for your daughter very quickly. We determined that your daughter is SC and she is having major anemia complications. She needs a transfusion. Her blood group is O-. She can get blood ONLY from someone who is O-. We need O- blood. We will check your blood to see if there is anyone who matches. Otherwise we will go to the blood bank.

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Yomi: (raising his voice) Did you say SC? That cannot be. Myself and my wife are AA. We can only have a child that is AA. Plus myself and my wife are both O+, how can we have O- child. Doctor, there must be a mistake somewhere.

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Doctor Akin: Oh, two O+ parents can have O- offspring. But regarding the genotype, I can tell the lab to check again. But you know it is possible that you are both not AA but you only think so. I will ask them to take blood samples from the both of you and check again.

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Lola: Yomi don’t get worked up dear. It will be OK.

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Doctor Akin took them to the lab (on the second floor of the hospital). As he was leaving, his eyes discreetly met with Lola’s (Yomi is unaware of this)….she winked and so did he.

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................................................................................................. . (Please click for EPISODE 3 and 4 );-)

LIFE'S CHOICE (1)

For your reading pleasure, a very interesting story..LOVE UNDER WATER (EPISODE 1)Copyright* – Femi Job


Funmi: I really love Wale. But he hasn’t proposed (marriage). We have been going out for over 5 years now. Whenever I raise the topic about marriage, he smiles, tells me he’ll marry me and ends the conversation. I am not getting any younger. I will be 36 in June. My biological clock is already having epilepsy – I can hear the alarm bells blowing. I am like an expired drug product on a dusty shelf in a tiny unkempt medicine shop. What am I supposed to do?! How do I let him know that he has to marry me? Aaah, Tayo, Lola, won’t I marry (starts crying)!

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Tayo: Funmi, stop crying! See, you have to understand some basic things. Marriage is not everything Funmi – I don’t know why you see it that way. You love Wale, Wale loves you – what more do you want to add to that? You guys have great chemistry. Your love for each other is primary, marriage is secondary, everything else is tertiary! Hang on in there. Marriage should not be rushed. GOD’s time is the best you know. So, just relax and wait for such a time that he asks you to marry him, whenever that time is – could be tomorrow, could be in the next 10 years. Do not put pressure on him. Some men do not like pressure. Plus, you know that you guys don’t have to be married to be a couple, right?

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Lola: Don’t downplay the importance of marriage o. Marriage is primary. You are not really a woman until you marry. If you don’t marry you are a ‘girl’ – a small girl. Marriage is ordained by GOD and important therefore. It is only girls that have nobody to marry them that say that marriage is not important. Anyway, Funmi, my advice for you is to get pregnant for him – he will have to marry you then! It was because I got pregnant for Yomi that he proposed to me and married me o – and we are happily married!

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Tayo: NOOOO, don’t get pregnant for a man you are not married to o – he’ll simply tell you to abort the thing – like Akin told me to! I am talking from personal experience (pauses)….Because hanging pregnancy on a man to make him propose marriage worked for Lola does not mean it’ll work for Funmi – it didn’t work for me….well, enough of that! Oh, back to what you just said Lola – marriage is NOT everything. In the bible, we are told that not all men (and women) need marry. The Apostle Paul wasn’t married and he said it was OK. So, that argument about marriage being important is just an argument people use to compel people to wear wedding gowns and suits – it’s all ceremony…if you don’t marry, you are a ‘lady’, if you marry you are a ‘mama’….I mean, see our friend Dupe, (she laughs and points at Dupe) before she married she was a ‘lèpa t’o bad gaaaan’…after marriage, she’s an ‘òròbò t’o nas-ty’! How good can marriage be when it turns a beautiful girl into this?….no offence meant, Dupe, but you know the point I am trying to make. So, Funmi, do not listen to Lola o….do not let anyone pressure you into marriage o. Try and enjoy the single life before you walk down that aisle…..when you walk down that aisle you are finished!!!! Plus, like I said, you don’t have to be married to be a couple.

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Dupe: Haba, Tayooo, you don’t need to insult me now. I am happily married. I know I put on some weight but I will still lose all that – I will become that l’epa to baaad again, you watch me! But Funmi….regarding your case, my answer is simple – If the guy won’t propose marriage, then you have to dump him and move on. There are many men out there. Find someone who will propose marriage and marry that person. You can start by making him know that there are other guys after you. For all we know, Wale may not even marry you. My advice – give him an ultimatum, and if he doesn’t propose, then dump him. I gave my husband ultimatum before he proposed, and we are now married. I believe that if I didn’t do so, I may be like Tayo here – she doesn’t believe in marriage because she doesn’t have anybody who wants to marry her ni.

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Tayo: ...but there are no other guys after Funmi. Funmi, have you considered moving in with him? I know it sounds shocking – but is it really that SHOCKING? We are in the 21st century. Things are changing. I can understand your misgivings about moving into a house with a man. But see it this way – you are moving into the house of a man that you love…a man that you will marry. See, some men will not get married unless they have to __ unless you force their hand. You visit him at his house almost every other day, and he visits you almost every other day too. You do everything together. You sleep in Wale’s bed in Wale’s house, and you guys f***, pardon my french. So, what is the difference? You can pretend that you guys are not having sex and pretend that you are a virgin and that he will come and pick you up from your father’s house. BUT that is high level hypocrisy, and you know it. You and Wale are already living like husband and wife in secret, and pretending to the whole world that you are just dating. You are as good as married my friend – so, move in with him. In this way, he will be reminded about why he MUST propose. All I am saying is that instead of making this a secret thing – which makes it look wrong – make it right. You know they say ‘anything that you do in secret must be brought out into the open’….Hey, do not live your life because of what people will say. That is not the way to live. You need to do what you feel is important, not what everybody else thinks is important.

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Lola: (turns towards Tayo) Heeeey! Haaaa, Tayo, TAYO!!! Which kind of advice are you giving Funmi? That she should not consider marriage as a very important event in her life? Do you know how people look at unmarried women that are 36? They look at them as if they are unfortunate. I am married and I can tell you that marriage is a very beautiful thing. How can she move in with a man she’s not married to? Funmi, do not listen to Tayo o - she will mislead you.

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Funmi: (turning towards Lola) THANK YOU JARE! (turns towards Tayo) Moving in? GOD forbid! How can I move in with a man that am not married too. That is high level fornication. ….how can you even suggest such a thing to me! Which kind of advice are you giving me? Move in with a man? Everybody will know that we are ‘banging’! Make you no turn your friend to ‘ashawo’ o. I am a born-again sister….

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Tayo: (cuts in) …you are a born-again sister that is 35 years old and unmarried – you should know that you are not doing something right. With all the ‘brothers’ out there, you are still consoling yourself that you are OK! And you are doing ‘holy-holy’, as if you are a virgin. You are already fornicating, so cut out the bulls***. There is no virgin in this room (refers to all the ladies), and even Lola and Dupe were not virgins before they married, abi I lie? In fact (laughing), Lola and Dupe are lucky that their husbands did not know which kind of lifestyle they lived before they married them, abi I lie? Haaa (digresses) If only Dupe’s husband knew that she was ‘ashawo’ before he married her (laughing)

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Dupe: (raising her voice) It seems as if you are just trying to insult me today. What is your problem?! Something is wrong with you! Or you are jealous because I married before you? You are jealous because I married a very good brother unlike your own Akin, abi? The past is the past……we are not talking about me (or Lola), we are talking about Funmilade. (pauses)…you know you are likely never going to get married. You are a prostitute pretending to be a lady. Where I am from, prostitutes do not give advice. You sleep with every man you date and you move in with every man that fancies you. You even do one-night stands. I don’t know what we are supposed to call you. You are worse than a dog…you are just unfortunate. You need to change yourself, and then maybe some guy will even THINK about marrying you. So, SHUT your mouth, and let the sane people give Funmilade advice. You should not even be talking.

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The whole room fell silent. There were some words exchanged (words not appropriate to write). Tayo stormed out, shaking with rage and anger. Lola followed her. Dupe hissed and turns to Funmi.

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Dupe: As I was saying before that idiot opened her stinking mouth -- You need to have a serious discussion with Wale. Let him know how you feel. Let him know that you are not getting any younger. And then give him an ultimatum...if he doesn't propose, then it is not meant to be. If a man loves you, he won't keep you waiting forever. 5 years is a very long time to wait for a proposal'

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(fade)



Tayo was at home. She was still angry…and bitter. How dare Dupe address her like that. Then she picked up her phone and dialed Funmi.

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Funmi: Hello…..Tayo

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Tayo: Hey, as I was saying before – I think you should move in with Wale – that is the only REAL advice that I can give you. I know that you love him and he loves you. Lola is talking nonsense about you getting pregnant for Wale…it’s not time for that yet. Dupe is talking nonsense about you dumping Wale – she doesn’t want you to be happy and she’s trying to make you sabotage your relationship. Lola’s and Dupe’s views are both extremist views, mine is more realistic and straightforward.

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Funmi: Thank you so much Tayo, I will think deeply about what you said. OK.

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They exchanged pleasantries and the call ended. Tayo looked at her wristwatch – the time was 4’48pm – she dialed a number.

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Tayo: Hey sugar, I am feeling very horny. Can you come over right now!

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The response was what she wanted. She spent the next 20 minutes tidying up her apartment. At 5’15 pm there was a knock on the door. She jumped on the man and they started kissing hungrily. They undressed even before they got into the bedroom and they made love. (I can’t give you the details -- too x-rated -- just that it was very wild). As they lay in bed, spent after an intense session, Tayo decided to speak her mind - to punctuate the pleasured breathing that escaped from their bodies.

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Tayo: Wale, Funmi is upset that you haven’t proposed to her. I adviced her to step it up to the next level and move in with you. You know that can’t happen because you have to make out time for me always. You can give her an engagement ring to console her -- I can get you a ring to give her.

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Please click here for Life's Choice 2

HELP 4 (A HUSBAND'S BETRAYAL)

Hello Dear Patient Reader ;) By my thinking any one of us can be silently going through terrible ordeals in our lives thinking we are alone, and believing there is no solution, no way out, well there is a way out! All you need to do is speak out or write anonymously, someone somewhere will respond to you. You are never alone, certainly not in blogsville. So I was browsing blogsville when I came across some stories. They claim to be true life stories and the writers actually need our advice. I couldnt resist but bring some of them to them to my blog so readers who have gone though a similar experience can play agony aunt and give them solutions. Or you can even give them some tough love as well. They will be published from time to time in a series titled 'HELP', this is the fourth part. You can find Help 1 Help 2 Help 3 just by a cick. So here is another one of the stories, names adjusted for obvious reasons, published unedited, all words are exactly as she wrote it...

SHE WROTE: My husband came home one night calm and happy, I was surprised but happy. He's been out of control for sometime now, actually since I lost my dad two years ago. He became the CEO since my dad died, it was on the will for my husband to become the CEO and my baby brother the Managing director. I've done everything in my power to make things right but whatever I do is not good enough. This wasn't the same Tayo that I married. My parents were rich but their two children were trained well. I was working in my dad's company until I had my second child. My dad told me to stay at home and take care of the kids because I refused to get a maid and my grandma that was helping passed away at the time.(I lost my mom five years ago too) I enjoyed every minute of being a wife and a mom until I lost my dad. My husband came in that fateful day about three months ago, looked at me and said "I don't love you Kemi, I never did. I appreciate everything you have done but it is time I move on with my life. You can stay in this house, keep the cars and I'll arrange for monthly allowance for you and the kids. If your brother agrees with my lawyer's terms, I'll pay him generously for his share in the company. Thanks to your father, I owe the 70% of the company. Don't try to fight this, it is clearly written in your father's will." I woke up the following day at the hospital and by my side was dad's lawyer, she looked at me and smiled! Two weeks later, the lawyer came to see me at home and to my surprise, she brought with her a letter handwritten by my dad. I wish I could hug dad at that very minute. There was a clause in the will, if Tayo leaves me without any fault of mine or if he dies before me, I have to take over the company. Dad knew I could handle it, I've been working in the company since my first year in the university! Tayo came to the house two days after I saw dad's letter, begging me to forgive him. Why should I take him back please? We are not divorce yet but his girlfriend was living with him in my father's house when he moved out. My pastor is telling me to take him back because we have three kids together. I'm not confused on what to do but they are all getting on my nerves now. How do I tell the Pastor to mind his business please?

...aaaaaaaand on a lighter note...PATIENCE JONATHAN'S TOP 15 HITS

,
1. My husband and Sambo is a good people.
2. The President was once a child and the Senators were once a children.
3. My fellow widows.
4. A good mother takes care of his children.
5. The people sitting before you were once a children.
6. Yes we are all happy for the effort, it is not easy to carry second in an International competition like this one, (addressing press men after Female Under- 19 FIFA World Cup).
7. The bombers who born them?
Wasn't it not a woman? They were once a children now a adult now they are bombing women and children making some children a widow.
8. My heart feels sorry for these children who have become widows for loosing their parents for one reason or another.
9. We should have love for our fellow Nigerians irrespective of their NATIONALIT Y.
10. Thank God the Doctors and Nurses are responding to treatment.
11. I would rather kill myself instead of committing suicide.
12. Ojukwu is a great man, he died but his manhood lives on.
13. President did not eaten since morning
14 I donate me and my family on behalf of N20million'

"THROUGH A RAPIST'S EYES" (PLS TAKE TIME TO READ THIS. it may save a life.)

It seems that alot of attackers use some tactic to get away with violence. Not many
people know how to take care of themselves when faced with such a
situation. Everyone should read this especially each n every girl in this world.


THOUGHT THIS WAS GOOD INFO TO PASS ALONG...
FYI - Through a rapist's eyes! A group of rapists and date rapists in
prison were interviewed on what they look for in a potential victim
and here are some interesting facts:

1] The first thing men look for in a potential victim is hairstyle.
They are most likely to go after a woman with a ponytail, bun! , braid
or other hairstyle that can easily be grabbed. They are also likely to
go after a woman with long hair. Women with short hair are not common
targets.

2] The second thing men look for is clothing. They will look for women
who's clothing is easy to remove quickly. Many of them carry scissors
around to cut clothing.

3] They also look for women using their cell phone, searching through
their purse or doing other activities while walking because they are
off guard and can be easily overpowered.

4] The number one place women are abducted from / attacked at is
grocery store parking lots.

5] Number two is office parking lots/garages.

6] Number three is public restrooms.

7] The thing about these men is that they are looking to grab a woman
and quickly move her to a second location where they don't have to
worry about getting caught.

8] If you put up any kind of a fight at all, they get discouraged
because it only takes a minute or two for them to realize that going
after you isn't worth it because it will be time-consuming.

9] These men said they would not pick on women who have umbrellas,or
other similar objects that can be used from a distance, in their
hands.

10] Keys are not a deterrent because you have to get really close to
the attacker to use them as a weapon. So, the idea is to convince
these guys you're not worth it.

POINTS THAT WE SHOULD REMEMBER:

1] If someone is following behind you on a street or in a garage or
with you in an elevator or stairwell, look them in the face and ask
them a question, like what time is it, or make general small talk:
can't believe it is so cold out here, we're in for a bad winter. Now
that you've seen their faces and could identify them in a line- up,
you lose appeal as a target.

2] If someone is coming toward you, hold out your hands in front of
you and yell Stop or Stay back! Most of the rapists this man talked to
said they'd leave a woman alone if she yelled or showed that she would
not be afraid to fight back. Again, they are looking for an EASY
target.

3] If you carry pepper spray (this instructor was a huge advocate of
it and carries it with him wherever he goes,) yelling I HAVE PEPPER
SPRAY and holding it out will be a deterrent.

4] If someone grabs you, you can't beat them with strength but you can
do it by outsmarting them. If you are grabbed around the waist from
behind, pinch the attacker either under the arm between the elbow and
armpit or in the upper inner thigh - HARD. One woman in a class this
guy taught told him she used the underarm pinch on a guy who was
trying to date rape her and was so upset she broke through the skin
and tore out muscle strands the guy needed stitches. Try pinching
yourself in those places as hard as you can stand it; it really hurts.

5] After the initial hit, always go for the groin. I know from a
particularly unfortunate experience that if you slap a guy's parts it
is extremely painful. You might think that you'll anger the guy and
make him want to hurt you more, but the thing these rapists told our
instructor is that they want a woman who will not cause him a lot of
trouble. Start causing trouble, and he's out of there.

6] When the guy puts his hands up to you, grab his first two fingers
and bend them back as far as possible with as much pressure pushing
down on them as possible. The instructor did it to me without using
much pressure, and I ended up on my knees and both knuckles cracked
audibly.

7] Of course the things we always hear still apply. Always be aware of
your surroundings, take someone with you if you can and if you see any
odd behavior, don't dismiss it, go with your instincts. You may feel
little silly at the time, but you'd feel much worse if the guy really
was trouble.

FINALLY, PLEASE REMEMBER THESE AS WELL ....
I know you are smart enough to know these pointers but there will be
some, where you will go "hmm I must remember that" After reading,
forward it to someone you care about, never hurts to be careful in
this crazy world we live in.

1. Tip from Tae Kwon Do: The elbow is the strongest point on your
body. If you are close enough to use it, do it.

2. Learned this from a tourist guide to New Orleans : if a robber asks
for your wallet and/or purse, DO NOT HAND IT TO HIM. Toss it away from
you.... chances are that he is more interested in your wallet and/or
purse than you and he will go for the wallet/purse. RUN LIKE MAD IN
THE OTHER DIRECTION!

3. If you are ever thrown into the trunk of a car: Kick out the back
tail lights and stick your arm out the hole and start waving like
crazy. The driver won't see you but everybody else will. This has
saved lives.

4. Women have a tendency to get into their cars after shopping,eating,
working, etc., and just sit
(doing their checkbook, or making a list, etc. DON'T DO THIS! The
predator will be watching you, and this is the perfect opportunity for
him to get in on the passenger side,put a gun to your head, and tell
you where to go. AS SOON AS YOU CLOSE the DOORS , LEAVE.

5. A few notes about getting into your car in a parking lot, or
parking garage:

a. Be aware: look around your car as someone may be
hiding at the passenger side , peek into your car, inside the
passenger side floor, and in the back seat. ( DO THIS TOO BEFORE
RIDING A TAXI CAB) .

b. If you! u are parked next to a big van, enter your car from the
passenger door. Most serial killers attack their victims by pulling
them into their vans while the women are attempting to get into their
cars.

c. Look at the car parked on the driver's side of your vehicle, and
the passenger side. If a male is sitting alone in the seat nearest
your car, you may want to walk back into the mall, or work, and get a
guard/policeman to walk you back out. IT IS ALWAYS BETTER TO BE SAFE
THAN SORRY. (And better paranoid than dead.)

6. ALWAYS take the elevator instead of the stairs. (Stairwells are
horrible places to be alone and the perfect crime spot).

7. If the predator has a gun and you are not under his control, ALWAYS
RUN! The predator will only hit you (a running target) 4 in 100 times;
And even then, it most likely WILL NOT be a vital organ. RUN!

8. As women, we are always trying to be sympathetic: STOP IT! It may
get you raped, or killed. Ted Bundy, the serial killer, was a
good-looking, well educated man, who ALWAYS played on the sympathies
of unsuspecting women. He walked with a cane, or a limp, and often
asked "for help" into his vehicle or with his vehicle, which is when
he abducted his next victim.

I'd like you to forward this to all the women you know. It may save a
life. A candle is not dimmed by lighting another candle. I was going
to send this to the ladies only, but guys, if you love your mothers,
wives, sisters, daughters, etc., you may want to pass it onto them, as
well.

Send this to any woman you know that may need to be reminded that the
world we live in has a lot of crazies in it and it's better safe than
sorry.

If u have a heart or compassion share this

WE CAN SHARE JOKES AND SPAM MAILS TO OUR FRIENDS & NETWORKS
PLEASE FOR ONCE SHARE THIS AND
LETS TRY TO HELP THEM.

‘Helping hands are better than Praying Lips’ – give us your helping hand.
SHARE IT WITH ALL UR FRIENDS.

AT LEAST PEOPLES WILL KNOW WATS GOING IN WORLD.

Friends So Please Share....Your one share can Help to spread this information.

THOUGHT PROVOKING ARTICLE-->"I'm currently an active pastor and I'm also an atheist,"

Just to start by saying, I empathise with the lady in this article. While I dont think I can ever be an atheist, I guess a build up of events within her immediate society ultimately led to her decision.

I personally find myself having issues with organised religion. I find myself questioning the antics of the leaders of some of these religious institutions. I feel there is a lot of wickedness and double standards originating from those buildings and spilling into the larger society.

The strange thing is that in the more secular society I have lived in, some of the religious insitutions, where available, are very concerned and are even supportive of the welfare of their members,their general society and even reaching out to countries beyond their borders displaying the selfless and loving attitude that are part of the tenets of their religious beliefs.

But in contrast, some of the religious institutions within the African American Society appear to be consumed with prosperity for prosperity sake. Then speaking of Nigeria, some of the religious bodies here appear to focus more on enriching the immediate family/social circle of the founding members, by 'inducing' the general members to part with certain material and financial possessions than having any meaningful impact in the heavily impoverished larger society..its a complex problem.
That said, I remain a person of faith, I dont think I can ever question the existence of God at all. Anyway thats my view, readers, do meet Theresa...

Teresa MacBain has a secret, one she's terrified to reveal..."I'm currently an active pastor and I'm also an atheist," she says. "I live a double life. I feel pretty good on Monday, but by Thursday — when Sunday's right around the corner — I start having stomachaches, headaches, just knowing that I got to stand up and say things that I no longer believe in and portray myself in a way that's totally false."

MacBain glances nervously around the room. It's a Sunday, and normally she would be preaching at her church in Tallahassee, Fla. But here she is, sneaking away to the American Atheists' convention in Bethesda, Md.

Her secret is taking a toll, eating at her conscience as she goes about her pastoral duties week after week — two sermons every Sunday, singing hymns, praying for the sick when she doesn't believe in the God she's praying to. She has had no one to talk to, at least not in her Christian community, so her iPhone has become her confessor, where she records her private fears and frustrations.

"On my way to church again. Another Sunday. Man, this is getting worse," she tells her phone in one recording. "How did I get myself in this mess? Sometimes, I think to myself, if I could just go back a few years and not ask the questions and just be one of those sheep and blindly follow and not know the truth, it would be so much easier. I'd just keep my job. But I can't do that. I know it's a lie. I know it's false."

MacBain made that recording in her car on the way to Lake Jackson United Methodist Church several weeks before the American Atheists' conference.Teresa MacBain's husband, Ray MacBain, says he still believes in God but defends his wife's right not to.


Finding Atheism

MacBain, 44, was raised a conservative Southern Baptist. Her dad was a pastor and she felt the call of God when she was 6. She had questions, of course, about conflicts in the Bible, for example, or the role of women. She says she sometimes felt she was serving a taskmaster of a God, whose standards she never quite met.

For years, MacBain set her concerns aside. But when she became a United Methodist pastor nine years ago, she started asking sharper questions. She thought they'd make her faith stronger.

"In reality," she says, "as I worked through them, I found that religion had so many holes in it, that I just progressed through stages where I couldn't believe it."

The questions haunted her: Is Jesus the only way to God? Would a loving God torment people for eternity? Is there any evidence of God at all? And one day, she crossed a line.

"I just kind of realized — I mean just a eureka moment, not an epiphany, a eureka moment — I'm an atheist," she says. "I don't believe. And in the moment that I uttered that word, I stumbled and choked on that word — atheist."

But it felt right.

About a year ago, MacBain found The Clergy Project, an anonymous online community of clergy who have lost their faith. Now she had allies, but no easy escape. She began applying for jobs, but when prospective employers asked why she wanted to leave the ministry, she didn't know what to say. She recorded her worries on her iPhone.



"So what the hell am I supposed to do?" she asks in one recording, her voice sounding desperate. "Really, the options are work at something like Starbucks or McDonald's — and even there they're going to ask those questions. I could even clean houses and not make a great amount of money — but at least nobody would be asking me questions."

Driving to church on Sunday, March 18, MacBain realized she could no longer bear her double life.

"I got to come out. I got to get out of it," she told her phone. "It used to terrify me, what people's reaction would be. But it's been so long now and I've done this for so long, I don't even care."



The sermon she gave that day was her last....The 'Freedom' Of Coming Out

On March 26, at the American Atheists' convention in Bethesda, MacBain seems almost giddy. The day before, she decided she would go before the conference's 1,500 or so nonbelievers and announce that she is officially an atheist.

"I am nervous," she says, "but at the same time I am so excited. I slept like a baby last night because I knew I wasn't going to have to live a lie anymore. Such freedom."

Moments later, in the darkened, cavernous conference room, MacBain steps onstage.

"My name is Teresa," she begins. "I'm a pastor currently serving a Methodist church — at least up to this point" — the audience laughs — "and I am an atheist."

Hundreds of people jump to their feet. They hoot and clap for more than a minute. MacBain then apologizes to them for being, as she put it, "a hater."

"I was the one on the right track, and you were the ones that were going to burn in hell," she says. "And I'm happy to say as I stand before you right now, I'm going to burn with you."

A few minutes later, MacBain strides off the stage into a waiting crowd. One man is crying as he tells her that her speech is "one of the most moving things I've seen in years." Another woman says she, too, had been a born-again Christian. "Join the club," she says as she hugs MacBain.

"I have never felt so appreciated and cared for, you know?" MacBain says later, noting that she has left one community — Christianity — for another. "New member, just been born — that's what it feels like."

Teresa MacBain has been out of work since leaving her position as a Methodist pastor earlier this year.

The Fallout
Two days later, MacBain returned to Tallahassee — and to reality.

"I didn't know how far or how explosive her coming out would be, but, then again, nobody did," says MacBain's husband, Ray MacBain. "The next morning, we got up, I went to work and my son Alex texted me and said it went viral."

The local TV station, WCTV, ran a series of stories about MacBain, interviewing her boss but never MacBain herself. Hundreds of people wrote comments on the site, and MacBain says they were painful to read.

"The majority of them, to begin with, were pretty hateful," she says, although some nonbelievers soon came to her defense. "For somebody who's been a good guy their whole life and been a people pleaser, it's really hard to imagine that overnight you're the bad guy."

MacBain tried to see the church's district superintendent to explain, but he canceled the meeting. She was immediately locked out and replaced, so she flew out to Seattle to meet with her colleagues at The Clergy Project. There, sitting alone in her hotel room on Palm Sunday, MacBain again turned to her iPhone.

"I don't want to go home," she muses in the recording, deflation flattening her voice. "I don't want to have to be in Publix or Wal-Mart or somewhere and worry about who's going to see me and who's going to corner me and just tell me off."

But MacBain did go home. People shunned her. Job interviews were canceled. The Humanists of Florida Association offered to pay her salary for a year, but there's no guarantee. Only two of MacBain's friends called her and took her to lunch. Meanwhile, her family was a refuge, even if they didn't all agree with her new views.

"I believe in God," says her husband, Ray. "And to be honest, I pray for her every night, I got friends praying for her."

But he says he adores his wife and defends her right to disbelieve. "That's why I spent 23 years in the Army. That's why I'm still a police officer. We have freedom of speech and freedom of thought. And God never forced anybody to believe, so who am I to step up?"

MacBain says she is still adjusting to life outside the church.'Life Is Just Different'A few minutes later, Teresa MacBain goes for a drive to the church at the center of her story. She says she has butterflies — this is the first time she's seen her church since she went public. Its 11:20 a.m., nearly time for the sermon. She's glad she's not inside.

"Not because of the people or anything," she says, "but because if I were in there, I know what I'd be doing. And that would be standing up and proclaiming something that I no longer believe in. So, yeah, I'm relieved that I don't have to do that."

Back at home, MacBain doesn't hesitate when she's asked what she misses most about her old life.

"I miss the music," she says. MacBain sang in church choirs and worship bands most of her life, and even though she no longer believes the words, she still catches herself singing praise songs.

She says she also misses the relationships — she'll often pick up the phone to call someone, then realize she can't. And she misses the ritual and regularity of church life.

"It's what I know. It's what I knew. And I still struggle with it. Life is just different," she says.

When it's pointed out that she hasn't said whether or not she misses God, MacBain pauses.

"No, no," she says. "I can't say that I do."

Barbara Bradley Hagerty
Source: From Minister To Atheist- A tale of loosing faith